the man you don't have to be
by baeberry
Summary: Camille-maybe, probably it's moving too fast, but I need him now. I need him more then ever.  Kendall-I don't care if I'm taking on a responsibility that's not mine all I know is I need her, I want her, I love her.
1. far to long

**_so this is my newest story and my first BTR fic so I'm kind of nervous. _**

**_but I just had to write this._**

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><p><strong><em>so a little bit about this story: it's based on <em>Brad Paisley's the man you didn't have to be. _it's not a song fic. but it is based on it. _**

**_so pretty much it goes like this. Kendall, Logan, Carlos, James, and Camille are all 23-24 and Katie is eighteen. _**

**_even though he doesn't have to be Kendall is there for Camille when she needs it the most. _**

**_I'm not going to say to much about it for now._**

**_rated T - _****_I don't think it will go beyond that_**

**_past Kendall/Camille. it will be explained. there might be some James and Katie. _**

**_words - 1,253_**

**_I don't own _**

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><p><strong><em><span>the man you don't have to be<span>_**

**_far to long_**

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><p>You would think at twenty three you would be able to walk up a couple flights of stairs without tripping over your own feet, flying backwards, tumbling down the twelve stairs and then finally reaching the landing, then you try to stand up but only to trip down the last flight, breaking you arm, collarbone, three ribs and gain a concussion. But then you wouldn't be Carlos Garcia, my best friend. I'm not really sure how it happened especially since there was nothing on the stairs for him to trip on but that's just him, but now after receiving a frantic call from James I'm standing here in his hospital room with our two best friends, trying to stifle our laughter as he tells us in detail about his entire day from getting the phone number of the girl who works at Starbucks to what he was thinking about while on his way to the hospital.<p>

Carlos finally fell asleep around two which was probably due to the pain killers the doctors gave him. I swear that kid could talk for hours. It's happened.

"So someone should stay." I turned to Logan who was sitting in a chair next to Carlos' bed. He's right though it's never fun to wake up in a hospital room by yourself.

"I would but I haven't been home in four days. I just want to take a nice warm shower in my own bathroom and sleep in my bed, instead of a stupid hotel bed." I've been in Colorado for the last few days, and I came to the hospital straight from the airport. I am defiantly ready to go home. It's been far to long.

"It's ok. Gustavo gave us the week off."

"Good. But I can stay if you want."

"No go on home we'll see you tomorrow."

I looked over at James who was staring contently at his phone. In the last two months I've barely seen any of them. With them on their national tour and me with a full schedule of games, we've all been busy. When we were twenty I decided to leave the band. I knew it would be a shock but I also knew that James could make it work with just Logan and Carlos. After four years I was ready to follow my dream, even if it couldn't be with The Wild. So now BTR is just the three of them and I play for the L.A. Kings. James wasn't happy at first, but as punches were thrown and words were said we got it settled. They would continue with BTR I would follow my dream and when our schedules matched up I would perform with them.

"Hey I don't have practice till next week maybe we could hang out. Catch a movie, dinner, maybe go to the rink or surfing."

"No interruptions." James finally looked up from his phone.

"No interruptions." I repeated back, which caused a small smile to play at both James and Logan's lips. We haven't hung out in forever.

"Awesome but maybe we should wait until Carlos comes home."

"Alright. But I should get going I'm dead on my feet right now and that floor is looking pretty comfy."

"Alright man. Are you sure you're ok to drive home."

"I'll be fine Logan. It's only a five minute drive." It's like when we moved out and bought our new house someone upstairs made sure we got a house close to the hospital.

"Just text me or James when you get home"

"Yes mother." James and I laughed at Logan's motherly behavior.

"Oh shut up it won't be my fault if you fall asleep at will and crash and die."

"Thanks for the faith dude."

"Go home."

"Fine bye, see you guys tomorrow." With that I turned on my heel and made my way towards the parking lot.

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><p>I am so ready to get home. Once I reached my truck I turned on my radio on which blasted, causing me to quickly slam the power button. I am never letting Katie barrow my truck ever. It's a miracle that girl can still hear.<p>

I pull out making my way towards the exit when some asshole speeds across the parking lot and slamming into a black and blue Mini Coop which then slammed into a light pole. I slammed on the break and threw my truck into park before running to the car and yanking the door open.

"Ma'am"

"Ma'am"

Nothing. Complete Silence. I pulled back her dark curly hair to check her pulse when I noticed the little beauty mark above her lips.

"Camille."

"Come on Cami open up your eyes." I rubbed her arm softly, trying not to move her around too much.

She blinked a couple of times trying to adjust. When she finally came to tears started streaming down her face, mixing in with the blood leaking from her nose.

"Kendall?"

"Hey shh shhh. I'm here. You're going to be fine. It's ok."

"Bab…" Her voice caught as a fresh round of tears start again.

"Camille calm down, I didn't understand what you said."

"My baby…" Her hands went instinctively towards her stomach. I looked down to see her hands covering the small barely noticeable bump. I can't believe she's pregnant. I didn't even know she was seeing anyone. Granted I've haven't seen her in almost six months. It's been far too long.

"Everything's going to be fine Camille."

I looked up as nurses and paramedics began to file around Camille's car. I let go of Camille's hand, and began to walk away causing her to start sobbing.

"Kendall… don't go. Please stay." She was pulled out of her car and strapped on to a stretcher. I tried to grab her hand but it was quickly swatted away.

I followed them into the E.R. before I was stopped by a nurse.

"Sir only family is allowed past this point."

I don't know what caused me to say what I'm about to say. But for some reason I felt a pull to Camille. One that wouldn't let me, (not that I want it to) just leave her.

"I'm her boyfriend. I'm the baby's father." The nurse gave me a sympathetic look before ushering me to the waiting room.

"Look just wait here, maybe call some family. A doctor will come and find you and let you know what's going on." I nod my head and thanked her before finding a seat. I sit down, my head in my hands, praying. Something I haven't done since I was eighteen.

Ever since we were at the palm woods together I was always attracted to Camille, and then slowly I fell in love with her. I gave up the chance to be with her for Jo because I was scared. It was a stupid dumb reason, which I still hate myself for. When we were eighteen we did get a chance to be together. Albeit a short one, it was still amazing. We were only together for two weeks before we James, Logan, Carlos and I went on tour and she got a starring role on a show that skyrocketed her career. I should have worked harder for her, but I didn't. And now she's pregnant with another man's baby. I know this is wrong and stupid but I just hope that I didn't lose my chance to be with her, because I'm still in love with her. And I will do anything to be with her again.

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><p><strong>so how did y'all like it. let me know what you like about it. whats your favorite part? <strong>

**I don't know how long this will be but I do have plans for this and like the first few chapters thought out.**

**but I think this will be at least ten chapters.**


	2. lightweight

_**a/n: I'm usually a faster updater but I've been super busy the last few days and I realized that until I hit the 1000 word mark it takes me forever to write but once I get past that I take off like a shot. but I'm going to try and update at least twice a week maybe three times if my week is slow.**_

**_this story will probably be over ten chapters but it will move fast Camille and Kendall won't have a normal relationship. Most couples don't in these situation._**

**_most chapters will be over a thousand words but probably not longer then this one._**

**_words: 3,302_**

**_warning: cussing_**

**_so read on and I hope y'all like it._**

**_disclaimer: I don't own_**

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><p><em><strong>the man you don't have to be<strong>_

_**lightweight**_

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><p>It's two in the morning and I finally get to see Camille. She hasn't woken up yet so I'm sitting here in a very uncomfortable chair holding her hand. Bruises cover her face from the impact of the airbag, which broke her nose and cheek bone, and the arm that I wasn't holding was bandaged from the surgery they had to do to fix her elbow. She's gonna freak when she wakes up, I just can't wait for her to wake up.<p>

The last time I saw her was six months ago when she was starting out as the lead host on a new talk show that was interviewing us. That was six months ago, she also had a douche-baggy boyfriend. Every time I think about him I want to punch something. I just hope to god that he's not the baby's father. I think that would just kill me. I hate the thought of her with someone else. We were only together for a few months; it was just supposed to be fun and a way to spend our summer together, but it meant pretty much everything to me.

The summer after I turned eighteen was our last before Logan, James, Carlos and I all moved out of the palm woods. We had enough money to buy ourselves a pretty decent size house. Mom decided to rent an apartment for her and Katie close to the house. That summer she and Katie went back to Minnesota to put the house up for sale and get the rest of our things. James got the lead role in a movie and was in New York all summer, Logan went to a med camp and Carlos went to visit family. So I was in L.A. all summer by myself. I don't even remember why I didn't go home but I'm glad I didn't.

The second week I was bored all by myself, all sad and lonely. I spent most of my time at the rink or down at the beach surfing, but there's only so much of that one guy can do before he gets bored. So one day when I went back to the palm woods to pick up some stuff for the house I saw Camille sitting by the pool studying a script for her new show. I walked over to her and we started talking. She was going to be all alone that summer also so we decided to spend it together as much as possible.

And that's how it all began. The days at the beach together, the drives up and down the coast, the dinners, the dumb shit we did, the movies, the nights in my old pick up looking up at the stars, her helping me when my dad died that July, the first time I told someone I loved them and really meant it, the nights we were together, we did everything together. When it was over I hated it, but I knew it wouldn't work back then.

I've been sitting here for almost four hours, I've called her apartment phone but no one has called back or come for her, maybe (and as wrong as it is hopefully) there's no one in the picture. My phone has been ringing on and off all morning, Logan's gonna be pissed when I see him next, well as pissed as Logan can get. The police came in and said the guy who hit her went out drinking after finding out his brother was killed by a drunk driver. He was drunk two times over the limit; he was coming to know for sure that it was his brother when he hit her. He should be the one in a hospital bed not her, she could f lost her child and all he walked away with was a few bruises. I don't think I could be angrier if I tried. I take a deep breath sinking deeper into my chair, clutching Camille's hand tighter, letting my eyes close and letting the darkness surround me.

I wake up to someone poking my shoulder. I open my eyes to see a smiling Camille looking back at me.

**Camille**

I woke up with a blinding head ach and my face feeling like it was smashed into a wall, in an unfamiliar room, with the lights low and a steady beep filling the room. I looked down at my hand that was being held by one bigger than my small one. When I looked at who it belonged to I smiled at the shaggy haired blonde laying back with his beautiful green eyes closed. I gently slipped my hand from Kendall's and called in a nurse.

After the doctors checked me out and ran some test I was left alone with a still sleeping Kendall. I tried falling asleep but it failed so I did something I haven't done in five years, I watched Kendall sleep. I studied his even breathing, the way his chest would move up and down with each breath, the way his lips parted a little and his nostrils would flair every time he took a deep breath.

I wonder how he's going to react. I still remember those summer nights when I was tucked under Kendall's arm and how I would dream of having a family with him. That's when I knew it was serious, that's when I knew it was probably going to end. I just broke up with Logan again, he was going on tour, it was supposed to be one summer, a summer of fun and just being together. It wasn't supposed to be blushing all the time I was around him, speeding days with him in his apartment thinking about our future, hanging on his every word, getting all nervous if I hadn't heard from him. By the third week of June I was falling in love with him, by Independence Day I was in love with him. When the summer ended we made a promise to keep in reach and we did and he was always in reach if I needed him. But how do you try to be friends with the man your madly in love with. I tried to move on but I never really could, he was always in control of my heart, he still his. To this day is he makes me weak and I don't think he has any idea, but I guess I'm just a lightweight.

But I can't help, every relationship I've been in, in the last five has ended because none of the guys have been Kendall. Maybe I could have been happy with one of them, maybe if I never was with Kendall. But the last guy I was with, the father of my baby, I didn't even like him like him or want to be with him. It was all for publicity and then one night a few months back we were at a party and one thing lead to another and now I'm pregnant. I've always wanted kids but I wished it was in a different situation with a different man.**(Kendall.) **I just hope this day goes better than yesterday.

The doctor came with the test results, telling me that I was fine and so was my baby and that I would be discharged later on today. After Dr. Jepson left decided to wake up Kendall who had somehow managed to take a hold of my hand again. I looked over to him, stretched out in the chair, his jacket wrapped around him, with a blanket on top of him and his beanie placed over his eyes and ears.

"Kendall wake up." I shook the hand that was grasping mine.

"Come wake up." Nothing.

"Kendall!"

"Dude wake up." Seriously he such a deep sleeper. If he isn't going to wake up, I'm just gonna have to try something else.

"Kendall!" poke.

"Kendall!" poke.

"Kendall!" poke. poke.

"Kendall!" poke.

"Kendall!" poke.

"Kendall!" poke. poke. poke.

"Kendall!" poke.

"Kendall!" poke. poke. poke. poke.

I pulled myself up higher on my bed, which is hard to do with only one arm available straightened out my hair and smiled as Kendall's eyes fluttered open. He sat up rubbing his hands across his face, pushing back his beanie, allowing me to his eyes. He looked annoyed but once he looked up he smiled.

"You're awake."

"So are you. Thank you."

"For what?"

"Saving me. Staying with me, which you didn't have to do."

"Nonsense I wanted to stay. I wanted to make sure you were ok. And plus you're gonna need a ride home when you leave."

"Well thank you anyways. I mean it. And didn't you just get home?"

"Yea yesterday morning."

"What were you doing here? I'm pretty sure you don't just hang around the hospital waiting for girls to save."

"Hey you never know, maybe I'm a secret super hero. Nah Carlos had an accident and he was brought up here. I was on my way home when Logan called me so I came here. I was gonna go to bed but a little brunet just needed me a little more than my bed. But you Camille if you wanted to see me that bad you could of just called."

"Shut up Kendall." He laughed as I threw a pillow, we cracking up as a nurse walked.

"Well Miss. Roberts I just have to do some paper work and then you can leave."

"Thankyou." I politely smiled as she turned around to Kendall and gave him a big smile.

"Mr. Knight it's nice to see again twice in one day. You really do have a keeper here Camille; he stayed here all night with you." Neither of us worried about correcting her.

"He is pretty amazing." I looked back to Kendall who was back to holding my hand. All I could do was smile which is not easy to with a broken cheek bone.

"Well get dressed and I should be back within the hour." With that she left.

"Where are my clothes?"

"They were pretty messy but I found some extra clothes in your car. I could only find shorts and a tank top but I did manage to find a cardigan for you. But it's pretty warm so you shouldn't get to cold." I took the clothes he was handing me and turned to him.

"Thanks. How is my car?" I bite my lip and look at him, hoping that the damage wasn't too bad. But I doubt it.

"It's pretty bad. I had triple A call and come and get it, they took to a garage and the garage is going to let me know."

"Awesome, just fucking awesome." I threw my clothes on to my bed and slammed my head onto the pillow. Which was not a good idea. Could this day get any worse? In an instant I was wrapped up in a pair of strong warm arms.

"Hey it's going to be ok."

"No…"

"What's wrong Cami?" I looked over to him and I realize that even though we still talk he has no idea what's going on.

"Come on tell me."

"Fine" I take a deep breath and turn towards him.

"Jack the guy I've been seeing, I don't even like him like that, our managers thought that since we both staring in that new movie together that it would be a good idea to be together. And then one night four months ago, one thing lead to another and here I am. My manager thought it was just an amazing idea and then his manager found out and they were all like 'Oh god this is just going to be amazing.' Jack doesn't even want the baby. He wanted me to have an abortion. But I just couldn't do that and he got so mad. That's why I was sitting in my car crying…"

"Camille. Come here." I scooted my way in to his lap and leaned into his chest.

"That's not even the worst part."

"It's not…" He shouted out. I looked up and I just had to look at the unbelieving look on his face.

"No" I giggled and shook my head as he wrapped his arms around me pulling me close.

"Well…"

"Be patient… But anyways the apartment that I pay four thousand dollars a month was bought by someone else and the owners didn't tell anyone and now the new owners want us out to remodel the whole building. And to top it off the want us out by tomorrow and I have nowhere to go. I've been so busy with the show and then the movie and Jack and now the baby I just forgot. But seriously who gives people only two weeks to move its crazy…"

"Camille calm down and breath, your gonna hyperventilate. I think I have an idea."

"How can I calm down. I'm going to be out of a home, I'm going to have to move into a hotel or something and my mother wants to come down here because she thinks that I can't handle it and I can but I cannot handle that women. I will go postal Kendall I swear, and I'm going to be a single mother because I will not let Jack around my baby and now my car. Like I can afford a new one but I really liked that one. What am I going to do…?"

The next thing I knew was Kendall's lips were softly pressing against mine. Before I could do anything he pulled back.

"What was that?" I looked up at Kendall who had that '_I_ _do what I want and you know you love it_' look on his face; he looked back at me and just cockily smiled.

"I had to do something before you hurt yourself, I know we're already in a hospital but that doesn't give you a reason to hurt yourself."

"You're such a dork Kendall." I couldn't help replaying the kiss as leaned back into his arms.

"You love it so as I was trying to say before you went nuts…"

"Ah! I take offence to that."

"Well it's the truth… anyways since Katie is eighteen and mom lets her stay home by herself when she goes back to Minnesota we have an extra bedroom."

"Really?"

"Yea, you could stay there until you find a new place or for however long you need." I looked up and I could swear I saw a glimmer of hope flash in his eyes. James has told me that Kendall still has feelings for and damn I hope he's right.

"Well if it's ok with the boys it'll be fine with me." With those words Kendall gently took me in his arms all the while trying to mind my arm.

"Awesome, it should be fine with everyone and even if it isn't they can suck it."

"Wow you're so nice."

"I know and you love it."

"Of course I do."

"Oh you're gonna have to stay in my room for a few days until we can get the room all cleaned up and your things."

"Where will you stay?"

"On the couch."

"Oh I can't put you out like that Kendall." I knew he would say that, but I can't let him sleep on a couch.

"I'll be fine, Camille."

"Won't you be uncomfortable?"

"Camille really?" I nod my head and he just laughs.

"I'm used to sleeping on a tiny cramped bed in a bus with three other boys for months at a time. I'll be fine."

"Ok if you're sure."

"I am and the decision has already been made." I smiled and leaned over to him, kissing his cheek. I can't believe it I'm going to be living with three boys I consider my brothers and the boy I've been in love with since I was eighteen.

"Thankyou Kendall really."

"It's ok Camille really. And plus I want to do this. Ok?"

"Yea ok but still thank you."

"Alright get changed so we can go. I also grabbed your bag and some sandals."

"Thanks." I took my clothes and slipped of the bed. I walked into the bathroom and slipped of my gown and let it fall to the ground. I stared at the image that was looking back at me and noticed the black and purple bruises coloring my skin going from under my shoulder and under my bra mixing with the purple lace and skirting over the small bump that's beginning to form. I rubbed my hand over it and turned to the side, it's so small, but it's still there. I can't believe I'm four months pregnant, you can't even tell yet which is strange.

I grabbed the teal tank top off the counter and tried to put it. It didn't work. I tried again but I once again failed. So I did the only thing I knew to do.

"Kendall."

"Yea?"

"Come here I need your help."

I unlocked the door and waited for him to come in. The door opened and Kendall walked in, with one hand over his eyes and the other searching the wall.

"What's wrong, is everything ok? Where are you?"

"One yes I'm fine and two why are your eyes covered?"

"I don't know. I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable."

"You've seen me naked before weirdo; I think I'll be fine."

"Just trying to be polite." He murmured as he finally took his hands of his eyes and looked at me.

"Wow…" he cleared his throat and shook his head like he was trying to clear his mind. "Uh anyways what's up?"

"Um yea, I just need some help changing."

"Yea ok. Come here." I walked over to him and let him lift me up to the counter; he picked up my shorts and slipped them on. When he stepped closer to button the denim my breath hitched. We were so close, if I wanted to I could inch in and kiss him, I could tell he was thinking the same thing as he started to lean in. he was about to close the space between us just as someone knocked on the door.

"Yea?" Kendall obviously frustrated shouted.

"Is everything ok, I have Camille's papers?" Kendall groaned and walked out, leaving me frustrated and kind of cold. I knew he was going to kiss me. A few minutes later he came back in.

"I signed you out and everything. So as soon as we're done we can go." I nod my head barely breathing, not saying a word. I have no clue what would come out if I did. I let slip my tank top on and then taking off my sling and gently slipping on my cardigan before placing my arm back into the sling, handling me like I was glass, neither of us not saying a thing. When he was done, he looked at me one more time before walking out the door.

I followed him out slipping into my sandals and grabbing my bag. He put his arm around my waist gently guiding me down to the parking unit. The whole time we were both silent. It was awkward at first, but steadily became comfortable.

When we made it to his truck, he opened the door for me; before I got in he turned me around and grabbed my face kissing me hungrily but softly. He pulled away smiling, he kissed my forehead before helping me into the truck. He kissed my forehead once again before shutting the door. As he walked around I sat there smiling and oh so confused. But I realized something I was wrong earlier about this day getting any worse. So wrong. But so happy.

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><p><strong><em>review please. and tell me what your favorite part is.<em>**

**_and thankyou to my first three reviewers y'all are awesome_**

**_the next chapter should be up monday sometime_**

**_and thanks to y'all that alerted or favorited_**

**_b._**


	3. your new home

**_a/n: ahhh! eight reviews for this story y'all are awesome._**

**_so I decided that I'll update twice a week mondays and thursdays, I'll try to do it before eight my time which I failed at doing tonight._**

**_but yea so here's chapter 3 I hope y'all will like it._**

**_words: 2,530_**

**_warnings: cussing and semi mentions of abuse._**

**_I don't own._**

**_read on. p.s. so yesterday (10/17) when I posted this chapter the word count was off and I didn't get that well today (10/18) i was re-reading the 3rd chapter and I noticed that the first part of the chapter was missing it is and isn't important but it pissed me off that that part just disappeared so her is the original chapter _**

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><p><strong><em><span>the man you don't have to be<span>_**

**_your new home_**

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><p>The drive to the boy's house was short and unlike I thought it would be it wasn't really awkward. Which I thank god for. I hope the guys are ok with me moving in only even if it's a short time. But like Kendall said he doesn't think that they'll have a problem. I mean I don't think there will be any problems either but I've had a past with Logan, kissed James, I've never really done anything with Carlos thank god because that would probably just complicate things even more then they probably will be. I don't want any more complication. But who knows.<p>

The sound of thunder booming overhead shakes me from my thoughts as we pull into a long driveway with a chained gate stopping us, I took a deep breath willing myself to calm down; as I let out it Kendall puts the truck in park and grabs my hand rubbing the pad of his thumb over the backside of my hand. I turned my head to smile at him but just ended up getting lost in his bottle green eyes. He returns my smile, bringing my hand up to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the inside of my hand, once again leaving me weak. As soon as he placed my hand back down I felt cold and empty, I was about to ask him what he was doing when he got out of the truck and walked to the gate, unchaining it pulling it forward, he walked back to the truck, jumping in and pulling forward and hopping out and shutting the gate.

The rain started to pour as he raced to back to the truck. His blonde hair drenched flopping over his eyes making him look adorable. He makes to the door wrenching it open which causes him to slide on the mud almost falling. He caught the door at the last second, pulling himself up and hopping into the front seat. I look over to him trying not to laugh (but failing miserably) at the way he's cursing at the sky for raining while he's outside of the car and then stopping the second he gets in the car.

"You think this is funny?"

"Very" I clasp my hands over my mouth still trying to stifle my laughter.

"The things I do for you…" I heard him murmur with a hint of anger my smile fell, I looked forward turning my body towards the door, when I heard laughter coming from Kendall.

"You jerk…" I smacked him and he just took off towards the house. My smile came back as he took my back my hand.

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><p>After Kendall pulled up and parked I got out of the truck and followed him up a little path to a large white two level Dutch colonial with a wraparound porch, which kind of surprises me. I always thought they would be living in a huge gigantic party mansion not something so simple and quiet. We had to drive almost a mile from the gate just to get here. Don't get me wrong the house is nice and huge, just not something that I ever pictured any of the boys living in. But this was a place I imagined myself living in, starting a family with the guy I love.<p>

"Hey you coming?" I looked up at Kendall who was watching me with a smirk on his face.

"Uh yea." I shook myself out of my thoughts only to realize that it started to pour again. I ran up to and let him guide me into the front part of the house and then into the kitchen. "This is really nice Kendall."

"Thanks, it was the only one that we could really agree on. It's nice, secluded; close to the beach but still close enough for the four of us for work. It kind of reminded me of my grandparent's home. You seemed kind of shocked"

"Uh yea I am… I was. This just isn't something I imagined y'all in. I always thought you guys would find something that was like a larger version of the apartment." We both laughed.

"Yea your probably right, but we've all grown up." I smiled at Kendall which he returned and handed me a bottle of water.

"Kendall?"

"Yea"

"Why did you kiss me?" I took in the look on his face, one that read that he was guilty. "I liked it. I did really. I just want to know why." He smiled, setting down his water and then pulling me towards him.

"Look I don't know. We both know that I was going to kiss you in the bathroom but then we got interrupted I kind of that maybe I shouldn't but when we were at the truck I knew I had to kiss you."

Before I could say anything he cupped my cheek and kissed me again, he pulled away resting his forehead on mine.

"Camille that summer was the best summer of my life and I think we made a mistake by braking up. We were both scared, you just got out of a serious relationship with Logan and I hadn't a serious relationship since Jo, we didn't want to get hurt, but I think we could have worked it out. But I also think that maybe it all happened for a reason…"

"What do you mean for a reason? What reason?" I looked up incredulously at Kendall who was staring back at me.

"I mean maybe we weren't supposed to be together back then, but I'm not saying that we're not supposed to be together at all. I think things happened for a reason. Damn Camille there were many times when we could have gotten back together over the past five years but we never did, and there really wasn't anything stopping us, and I always questioned that. Every time I saw you at a premier or on tv, or around town you don't know how many times I wanted to go to you or call you up. But I never did and I always made excuses, I was busy, I had practice, you're not in town, you were busy, I was just too damn scared. But I also don't think we were supposed to be together then."

"What are you saying Kendall?"

"I'm saying that now we're supposed to be together, I want to be with you but I also want to take it slow, you just got out of a relationship and you're pregnant. But I don't really care that that baby isn't mine, I don't care. But I need you, I need to be with you, I want to be with you, Camille."

"Kendall I want to be with you too…" I had no clue what to say; "but you're right we need to take it slow. I can't get hurt again." I grabbed his face and brought it down to mine kissing him, letting him have full control. He's right though there were plenty of opportunities for us to get back together; I was scared that's why none of my other relationships ever worked out. I've always wondered what would happened if we stayed together, people always told me that it was just a summer. That I should just forget him and I tried but it didn't work.

I pulled away from him, and laid my head on his shoulder, leaning into him as he wraps his arms around my waist.

"I've missed you so much. I want to be with you too." I was going to tell him that I love him but I don't want to rush anything, which is probably a little late but I don't care. I didn't know what else to say so I left him with that. I'm glad he wants to take it slow, I was rushed into my last relationship and I hated it for more reasons than one and I know he'll figure it out soon that is if he hasn't already.

"I missed you too Cami. Welcome to your new home." He ran his hands up and down my back making me shiver.

He raised my chin so I was eye level with him, I know he wants to ask what I meant when I said that I can't get hurt again, but I silently prayed that he wouldn't, he seemed to get that I didn't want to talk any more so he kissed my forehead and pulled me to him.

"My god you're freezing. Come on I'll get you some sweats and put your clothes in the dryer. And then I'll order in some chinese food."

"Ok sounds good. What about my things?"

"We can get them after we eat." I nod my head yes, as I let him pull me into another part of the house. We down a blue hallway and into a room which I thought was Kendall's. But once I got a good look I realized that this was their extra room.

"This is horrible Kendall" I laughed out, it really is. It's a nice room but it's painted an ungodly shade of orange with boxes everywhere.

"I told you we use it for storage, it was going to be the spare but then I took the attic and when Katie comes over she has the room that I was going to use, so we kind of just forgot about it and turned it into storage. But it'll be ok. We'll figure it out, and we'll just put the stuff that's not your clothes in here but for now you can just stay in my room."

"The attic?" I remember when they first bought this place that it had gone to shit and they had to remodel it.

"Yea its awesome. Come on." I grabbed his hand and followed him down the hallway and to a dead end. Kendall jumped up and grabbed onto a handle and pulled it down revealing a flight of stairs. He braced the stairs and held his hand out for me to take.

"I am not going up there." I scoffed backing away from him.

"Oh come on it's fine. I've been using these stairs for five years, we all have. You will be fine, go up before me and I'll be right behind you." I looked at him unsurely but took a small step forward.

"Come on I want to show you something any ways."

"Fine, just don't let me fall."

"You know me better than that." I made my way up to the stairs with Kendall's hands firmly on my back.

When we got there he kept his hands around my waist as he showed me around his room and he's right it's awesome. His bed sits in an alcove and he has access to the roof. Its spectacular and he did it all himself.

He grabbed me a pair of sweats to change into and took my clothes, threw them in the dryer and then went to take a shower. I lay on his bed pulling one of his old jerseys closer to my body; I wonder how far this is going to go. I know he said he wants to be with me and that he doesn't care that I'm pregnant, but that has to take a toll on someone. What if he decides he doesn't want to be with me because of the baby? What if he decides that he can't take the pressure? I don't want to doubt this relationship before it already started but I can't help but worry.

**Kendall **

After putting Camille's clothes in the dryer and ordering some food I walk into the my bathroom and shed my clothing, after turning the hot water on I stepped in letting the water sting my skin. I don't know how bad I wanted to tell her that I love her, I think I'm going to wait but I font don't know how long I can do that for, but at least I know that we share the same feelings for each other. When I said that I didn't care about her baby not being mine, I meant it. I want to be there for Camille and the baby; I want to be there to hold her hair back when she's throwing up, for every single appointment, I want to be there for the rest of her life and that child's even if it isn't mine. I told her I would take it slow because I know she doesn't want to get hurt again. But I hope she knows that I will never hurt her, especially how Jack did. You don't get bruises like how she has from a car accident; it took everything I had not to find him and go beat his ass. I rinsed off, stepped out of the shower, dried off and changed back into a pair of jeans and a blue and red flannel. I walked out of my bathroom went and grabbed Camille's clothing and then walked back to my room where I noticed Camille sleeping; I walked over to the bed and laid a blanket over her, kissing her forehead before grabbing my wallet and sneakers.

I made my way down to the kitchen, where Logan and James were sitting around the island eating pizza while Carlos was sleeping on the couch. They looked up just as I reached the counter, Logan pushed Camille's bag and our food towards me. In all of the excitement with Camille I forgot to warn them about her staying and I forgot to call Logan letting him know what was going on and that I was not dead. Even though I knew he would be pissed the look on his face kind of scares me a bit.

"Hey Kendall."

"Hey guys…" I rubbed the back of my neck waiting for the interrogation to start.

"Where's your phone?" I also forgot to charge my phone.

"It's dead" Logan nods his head and took a sip of water before looking back at me. And damn if looks could kill.

"Well at least you're not dead."

"I know Logan I am so sorry I just got busy and lost track of time."

"Oh really?" I nod my head, praying that I can get back to Camille and not deal with Logan.

"Does it have to deal with the purse and the twice amount of food that you ordered."

"Yea it does. I need to tell you guys something…" Just as I said that Camille walked down the stairs (thankfully dressed in her own clothes that would probably make this situation worse.)

"Thankyou Kendall for telling me about the secret stairway… hey guys." She stopped dead in tracks as she noticed Logan and James.

"Camille."

"What are you doing here?"

"Yea about that Camille's going to be staying here for awhile…" No one said anything, which scares me a little, at least no one has freaked out. I can't wait to hear what they have to say when I tell them everything else. Oh joy.

* * *

><p><strong><em>review please. I got five for the last chapter so I y'all to double that. and like with the other two chapters I want to know what your favorite partparts were._**

**_I asked you what your favorite parts were and now I'll tell you what my favorite parts were._**

**_chapter one: defiantly when Kendall told the nurse that he was the father, it made me swoon._**

**_chapter two: when Kendall kissed Camille and said "I had to do something before you hurt yourself" I just loved it and where Camille kept poking Kendall._**

**_chapter three: you will see on thursday._**

**_b._**


	4. it's going to be different

_**a/n: chapter four wooo! thankyou to everyone again who has reviewed this y'all are awesome**_

_**it gets a little heated in this chapter**_

_**warning: cussing, almost sex and fighting**_

_**words: 3,210**_

**_no more disclaimer we all know I don't own this show._**

**_enjoy._**

* * *

><p><strong><em><span>The man you don't have to be<span>_**

**_It's going to be different_**

* * *

><p>"What's going on Kendall?" I looked from James to Logan and then to Camille. She looked unsure of what to say as did I.<p>

"Well you see…"

"Guys why don't you give Kendall and I a moment"

"Ok." I smiled at them and grabbed Camille's hand and lead her back to my room. Once there I sit on my bed and pull her into my lap.

"What should we tell them?"

"What do you tell them Camille? I don't want you to feel uncomfortable with all of this."

"I don't know Kendall."

"Ok well we can tell them we're dating again and with everything that's going on with your apartment we just decided to have you move in with me. Permanently." She smiled at that. We haven't talked about how long she would be staying, but now that we're together I want her here.

"Ok but I do want to tell them about the baby but just not yet."

"That's fine we'll tell them when you're ready."

"Thankyou Kendall"

"You don't have to thank me Camille, you're happy right?" I ran my hand through her hair, something I used to do to comfort her.

"Of course Kendall, if I'm with you I'm the happiest person. You're happy right; I mean this is a lot to handle. Kendall this is a lot of responsibility. I don't want to be burden."

"You're anything but Camille. I want this ok so don't doubt that. If I didn't I wouldn't of kissed you. And as long as I'm with you I'm happy."

"Ok. We should probably go back down there."

"Yea come on."I laid back pulling her with me and kissing up her neck.

"Kendall." She warned but I just moved her so she was straddling me. She wrapped her arms around my neck, finding my lips with hers. I swiped her lips with my tongue trying to get her to open her mouth, she giggle, kissing me harder but keeping her mouth shut, I nipped at her lips causing her to gasp allowing me to slip in my tongue, I let my hands move to her hips, going underneath her tank-top rubbing circles on her hip bone, moving them up and under her bra, rubbing her nipples, causing her to buck her hips into mine. She moved away from my lips, her own kissing a path down my jaw while grinding her hip into mine. I don't really know where this is going, but I know that I don't want to stop. I rolled her over on her back, placing my lower half on top of hers reclaiming her lips with mine.

"Kendall." She gasped out when I bucked my hips. I moved my hands down to the waistband of her shorts going for the button…

_**BANG. BANG. BANG. **_

I lifted my head up as the pounding continued.

"What the fuck." I grumbled. I laid my head down on Camille's shoulder; she kissed the side of my head and pushed me off of her.

"Go see what they want."

"Fine" I got off the bed and stomped over to the door pulling it open.

"What the fuck do you want?" I exclaimed as Logan and James stood there looking pissed off.

"What the fuck is going on?" I looked at Logan who barely ever cusses but I can't help that I got distracted

"You can't just drop something on us like that and then just run off Kendall. We would like to know exactly what's going on."

"Sorry I had to talk to Camille about something's and then we got distracted. We'll be right there." I closed the ignoring their protest. I locked the door and walked back to Camille, pulling her up and crashing my lips into hers in what I like to think of as a mind blowing kiss. Before I knew it Camille is pulling away, with a huge smile on her face might I add? She reached up kissing my forehead and pulling me to the door.

When we got downstairs Logan and James were back at the same position they were before went upstairs. I pulled out a seat for Camille and took the one next to her. Honestly right now I'm scared shitless.

"So are y'all going to explain?"

"Ok well last night after I left you guys there was an accident in the parking lot. I got out and went to help whoever was in the car, which turned out to be Camille. I ended up waiting until I could see her and then once I could I stayed with her for the rest of the night. I realized I still have feeling for her so we got back together. My phone died and I just forgot to let you know I am so sorry."

"Well I guess that explains Camille's face and arm. Are you ok Camille?"

"Yea I'm fine Logan thank you."

"I thought you had a boyfriend. Jack McClanahan."

"It was just a publicity stunt, I was never with that guy, he's a total jackass."

"Ok but not that I don't want you here Cami, cause it's going to be awesome but why are you living here."

"Oh well, Camille…"

I have no clue what to say. I guess Camille knew that because she laughed and took over.

"I'll tell them. I guess a few weeks ago the original owners of the apartment building that I was living in sold it. Now the new owners want to remodel it. I've been so busy with my show and movie and my b—never mind that I forgot everything and today is the last day to move out so when I told Kendall he asked me to move in." I looked over to Camille who is biting her lip. I grab her hand and rub circles on it. I know she nervous about her almost slip up.

"Oh" Logan looked up and then down and then back to Camille. I hope he doesn't **A) **still have feelings for her or **B) **have a problem with her staying or us being together.

"If y'all have a problem I guess I could find somewhere else."

"No Camille" Logan stood up and walked over to her giving her a hug.

"It's not a problem. We want you here. It's just going to be different."

"Yea Camille but it's going to be so awesome." James joined the hug and all three pulled me in.

"Guys your suffocating my girlfriend"

"Sorry."

"It's good. Thanks guys."

"I was wondering if y'all could help get Camille's things from her apartment and move them here."

"Yea I'm free."

"Yay. Most of it is just clothes and important things; everything is already pretty much in storage."

"Logan are you ok."

"Yea I'm fine I'll be happy to help I just need to take a shower."

"Oh ok" With that he left the kitchen and made his way to his room. He didn't look to happy. I know they dated and they shared a lot of first's but he broke up with her and it was five years ago, so honestly in my opinion I don't think he has a right to be angry.

"Hey why don't you eat while I go to talk to him?" I grab the food and handed it to her, before kissing her temple and walking the same direction Logan did.

I walked in just as Logan walked out of the shower, already half dressed, we've been friends forever there really isn't a sense of privacy between us anymore. I sat on his bed as he rifled through his drawers.

"Hey man"

"Hey what's up?"

"Are you ok with this whole thing? With me and Camille?"

"Yea Kendall I am. Dude don't worry." His shoulders slumped a little and he took two deep breathes. It was something he did when he was lying or comfortable or pissed about something.

"Dude we've been friends for the last twenty three years I know when you're lying so don't."

"Fine it's not that I'm not ok with it because I am honestly."

"Then what Logan. Are you still in love with her?"

"No Kendall. It just I don't know ok. Maybe I am. She was my first relationship, my first everything pretty much and so it hurts a little when I see her with my best friend. And when I saw her maybe old feelings came back ok."

"No not ok. You've had five years."

"So did you."

"Yea but I still had feelings for her and you know it. It was a mistake breaking up with her, I know it and she knows it. You said you were over her, so why are you acting like this."

"I don't know, it's just your living your dream of being the hockey player you always wanted to be and now you have the girl of your dreams. I don't know, I'm happy for you guys and your right I had five years, I didn't do anything cause I'm not in love with her, it's just I'm twenty three years old, by now I thought I would be in med school, engaged to my high school sweet heart. You have what I wanted for myself and one day your gonna marry Camille and you two are gonna have a bunch of kids and move on and it will be all perfect and I have no clue what I'll be doing." I went next to where Logan was standing by his window and wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

"My life's not perfect and it never will be, and Logan you can still go to med school, we'll all support you and you'll find that girl and you'll marry her and you'll have your two kids and three dogs and you'll save the world, and at the end of the day you'll have your wife and your children and you'll also have us. Just because I starting my life and following my dream doesn't mean I'm leaving you guys behind. I'd die without three." He laughed, but I mean it there my brothers and I don't think I'd be where I'm at without them.

"I don't know Kendall being a doctor was always what I wanted to do, but I don't think it is anymore, my dreams changed and I don't think they include being a doctor anymore. I think that's why I'm upset, you have everything figured out and I don't."

"Trust me I barely have anything figured out right now. What I do have figured out is I'm with Camille, I'm playing hockey like I wanted to and I have you guys and my mom and Katie and right now for me that's all I need, Logan if you don't think being a doctor is what you want to do than don't, just do what you want. James, Carlos and I will be there to support you and now so will Camille. If you want to be president we'll be there on election day waiting to vote for you, hell Logan if you wanted to become a bank robber I'll be there to hide the evidence. Just do what you and don't sweat it, when you figure it out it with smack you in the face and make sure that you know, and you'll find the girl. And we'll all be right there."

"So if I became a serial killer…"

"I'll be right there with the shovel and lighter fluid." It's true I would do anything in the world for those guys.

"You're an idiot, but I love you. Thanks Kendall."

"Anytime man, love you too." I stood up and pulled him into a hug. We may be twenty three year old men but we still hug. And we don't give a shit what people think.

"Come on lets go get Camille's things."

**Camille**

By the time we got all of my things packed and put in the back of Kendall's truck it was almost ten, I was hungry and so exhausted which is weird because Kendall didn't really want me to do anything to upset my injuries or harm the baby. All I really did was pack and watch and laugh as the boys bickered and complained about my stuff. I looked around my now empty apartment, realizing how large it was. I picked up one of the last boxes with my right arm, successfully balancing the box on my hip. I began walking down the stairs when someone slammed into me causing the box and my right side to be slammed into the wall.

I gasped and dropped the box, sliding down the wall, breathing deep, trying not to cry, I straightened myself out as tears fell down my cheeks, I lift up my shirt only to find the swelling that had gone down to rise again. I ran my fingers over the large bruise that Jack caused when he slammed me against a wall and then pushed me to the floor and kicked me. Thank god the only damage he caused was a few broken ribs and some bruises but no harm to the baby.

I tried to stand up but pain in my ribs was just too much, I fell back onto the floor letting my tears flow at full force. My whole body started shaking with tears when I noticed someone wrapping their arms around.

"Cami what happened?" I looked up at Kendall who looked like he could kill someone.

"Nothing someone just ran into me. I'm still a little sore from the accident, I'll be fine." He picked me up and carried me back to my apartment, setting me up on the counter and lifting my top over my head and setting it down next to me. He ran his fingers down my side causing me to shiver.

"Those aren't from the accident Camille. When did he do this?" I started to sob; I was so scared all I could do was cling to him. I know as soon as I tell him he's just going to go find Jack.

"Yesterday before my appointment. I told him that I was going to keep the baby and I didn't want him in our lives. He got so angry and just pushed me against the wall and he just…" I couldn't continue and Kendall didn't push, he slipped my top back on and lifted me off the counter.

"You're ok Camille. I won't let him hurt you ok?" I shook my head and let him hold me. He didn't have to say anything for me to know that it was the truth. I'm pretty sure he would die before he let anything happen to me. I nestled my head further into his chest when I felt a teardrop hit my cheek. When I looked up and saw Kendall crying it nearly broke my heart. I wiped his tears and kissed his cheek.

"Do you need to go to the hospital?"

"No I'll be fine." He looked me up and down and wrapped his arm around my waist before leading me towards the door.

"Let's go home Camille." Even though I was still crying those words made my heart skip a beat and my stomach jump. I followed Kendall down the stairs and to the truck where the rest of the guys were waiting.

When we got there James was flirting with the owner's daughter and Logan was waiting by his car. Logan looked up and made his way over to us.

"Do you mind if I borrow your girlfriend for a second Kendall?"

"Uh yea. I'll go try to pry James away from that poor girl." The three of us laughed, it was still true James Diamond is still a man whore.

"So what's up?"

"I just wanted you know that I am ok with you and Kendall. I guess I was just a bit jealous, my dreams changed over the last few years and I just felt like you two had everything figured out and I don't."

"We don't, trust me"

"Kendall said the same thing. I guess life's changing and so is everyone else. And I don't know what to do anymore."

"What about med school?"

"I don't know anymore. I still want to help people but I don't think being a doctor is the road I want to take."

"Logan, when you figure it out we'll all be right next to you supporting you with whatever you want to do. Even if it's illegal. "Logan looked at me, laughing and then pulled me into a hug.

"What?"

"You and Kendall pretty much said the same things. What is with you two thinking that I would be the one to do that."

"Because Logan it's always the quiet ones."

"Shut up Camille. You're made for him you know." I pulled Logan into a bone crushing hug when I heard loud shouting.

"You mother fucking bastard."

My eyes got wide as I saw Kendall punch Jack.

"What the hell is he doing?" I grabbed Logan's hand and dragged him to where James was trying to pull Kendall off of Jack.

"Kendall. Stop." As soon as James got Kendall to pull away I reached out for him and James grabbed Jack.

"What are you doing here Jack?" I knew this would happen if he came around.

"I wanted to apologize. But this jackass started hitting me for no reason"

"I'm her boyfriend asshole. And you know damn well the reason Jack."

"He's your boyfriend. Camille don't do this. I didn't mean to." Jack looked at Kendall and then at me and just laughed.

"Really? So you didn't mean to tell her to get an abortion and when she didn't you slammed her against the wall?"

"I wasn't thinking clearly… Baby I'm sorry. We can start over and get back together."

"I am not your baby. I never have been and I never will be. We were never together Jack."

Kendall let go of my hand and reached out for Jack grabbing him by his collar, the look on his face is probably the scariest look I've ever seen. His face is flushed and his eyes are dark.

"Stay away from **my **family. Stay away from Camille. Stay away from **our **child. If you ever touch Camille again I swear to god Jack I'll make sure James isn't there."

"Whatever Knight. Remember this I don't back down. Enjoy your whore." I'm pretty sure the whole entire town of L.A. could hear the noise of Kendall's knuckles meeting Jack's face.

Kendall walked away from Jack without a second glance and in an instant his arms were around me and his chin was resting on my head.

"Don't listen to him Camille. He's an ass. You're not a whore ok. Don't listen to him. Ok?"

"Ok." I couldn't really say anything else, nobody else has ever called me that, I know I'm not whore I've only been with three people my entire life, I know it was just said out of anger, I hope, but it still hurts.

"You're pregnant?" I lift my head off of Kendall's chest only to find a shocked Logan and a pissed off James staring at us.

Oh Shit.

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><p><strong><em>an: so what did you think be honest and let me know in a review and tell me what your favorite part was._**

**_chapter 3: my favorite was defiantly when he welcomes her home it was sweet._**

**_until monday _**

**_b._**


	5. the long haul

_**a/n: so I know I said that I would update thursdays and mondays but I had time to write this today and I don't know if I'll be able to update on monday. I have a lot of fucked up shit going on in my life right now**_

_**warning: cussing fighting**_

_**words: 2,055**_

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><p><em><strong>The man you don't have to be<strong>_

_**The long haul**_

* * *

><p>Right now I just wish I could disappear. I'm probably making it out to be worse than it actually is, and it's not like we're sixteen. But they're his brothers what they think is important. I don't want them to think that I'm using Kendall or that he's making a mistake, or that he's rushing into something that he might not want.<p>

"Camille you're pregnant?" Logan asked a second time. I couldn't answer him, I tried but I just started to cry.

"Yea Logan she is."

"How far along?"

"About five months." I looked back to the boys and James still looks pissed and Logan looks shocked but happy.

"The baby's not Kendall's"

"No it's not mine its Jack's." When Kendall said this James' face completely changed, it went from pissed to hurt and pain. He walked to his car; Kendall followed him and grabbed his arm.

"James what's wrong."

"Your gonna regret this Kendall. She's just using you." With that he shoved Kendall off of him, got in his car and sped off.

"Logan take Camille home." He walked over to his truck getting in and starting it. I reached out for the door just before he shut it. One thing Kendall hated more than anything was when someone took their anger out on someone that Kendall loved.

"Kendall just let him go."

"No Camille something has been bothering him for awhile, he doesn't get to hurt you because he's pissed." I started to say something when I felt Logan take my arm and began leading me to his car.

"Don't do anything stupid man."

"I'll try. Can you just take care of Camille?" By the tone of his voice I knew Kendall meant take me somewhere else so I walked to Logan's car and got in the front seat.

"What are you doing Camille?" The door opened and Logan stood there looking down at me.

"I'm driving, get in."

"Camille…"

"No Logan, I'm not going to let Kendall do something stupid now give me the keys and get in."

"Fine we all know how Kendall gets when he's angry." Thunder clapped overhead and in the distant you could see the lightning. What is going on with this weather?

"Yes, now get in."

"No you're a bad driver. I'll drive."

I scooted over and Logan got in and took off. I hope we get there fast. Kendall and James both have anger issues and their both way to passionate about things they believe. It's something that makes them so good at their careers; it also makes it ten times worse when they get mad.

We pulled up just in time to see Kendall punch James. Why couldn't anything be easy for me?

**Kendall**

I pulled up just behind James' car; I shut of my car and got out. I'm going to try and handle this maturely and calmly, pretty much only because my hand still hurts and James isn't scrappy or weak like Jack so I know he'll put up a fight.

I walked up to where James is standing and just looking at him makes me want to punch him. What right does he have to say that about Camille? I know her and I know she would never do anything like that.

"What the fuck is wrong with you James?" He looks up and there's tears streaming down his face.

"Just drop it Kendall."

"No. You basically just called my girlfriend a slut. What is wrong?"

"You won't get it."

"Damn it James I'm trying to get it but you won't let me in."

"You really want to know" His voice getting louder so I could hear him over the sound of thunder.

"Yea James I do so please enlighten me."

"This is real Kendall. This relationship with Camille isn't real. Your gonna fall in love with that baby and your gonna put your all into this with relationship with her and then one day something's going to happen and she's gonna leave and take that kid with her and you're gonna be heartbroken."

"Just because that happened with your parents doesn't mean that it's going to happen with me."

"It didn't just happen with my parents Kendall it happened with yours and Camille's. You can't fight it, history is just repeating it's self."

"Are you serious James, Camille and me are nothing like our parents. I would never lay a hand on my child and she would never leave hers."

"But she's going to lie to it and have it believe you're their real father."

"Shut up James, guys like Jack don't deserve to be a father; Camille's doing what's best for **our **child. And that baby is ours. Maybe he or she isn't mine by blood but I will be a father to that child. And you know what just because you're mother lied to you about your dad does not give you the right to be pissed off at me or Camille."

"You don't know shit Kendall."

"Oh really. I don't know how your mother whored around when you were younger and how she black mailed your dad into leaving and never seeing you again. I know James." I know it probably wasn't the smartest thing to say to him but maybe a little violence will do him good. So when his fist came flying at my face I didn't let it bother me. I threw my arm back and let it fly into his face, just as thunder boomed and a car door slammed. I also know something else is the matter with him and he's not willing to let it out, he's just as stubborn as always. So when I get the chance I slam him into the now drenched ground and pin him to it.

"What the fuck. Get off Kendall"

"No not until you tell me what's going on"

"You already know what's going on with me."

"I want the truth James. I know that all that bull shit I said about your parents is just that, it's all bull shit. You don't give a rat's ass about your mother anymore, and dad you could care less. So what is wrong and I want the truth this time."

"Fine but can you get off please" I nod my head and get off of him and pull him up.

"No more hitting. Truce" I agree and shake his hand.

"Your gonna leave."

"What?"

"Eventually you and Camille are gonna are going to get married and raise that baby or you're going to ask Logan, Carlos and me to move out and then we're not going to see each other more. We barely do now." He whispered the last part, I knew this is what he was mad about, why does he have to be so stubborn? Why can't my life be easy?

"James you know that not true."

"Yes it is. It started when you left the band…"

"James you can't hate me for following my dreams."

"I don't Kendall, in fact I am so proud of you, you are the best cent around and one day you're going to be captain and you're going to be married to Camille and have a bunch of kids. But you're going to forget about us, it's what happens when you follow your dreams."

I know I said I wouldn't hit him but with what he just said I can't help myself when I punch him in the jaw.

"What the fuck I thought we said no more hitting."

"Is that what you really think of me?"

"What"

"I'm not your dad or mine. I don't leave my family and that's what you are James. You and Logan and Carlos are family, you're my brothers, and I would not be where I am without the three of you. You have always been there for me; you've always been my family and now Camille's apart of that. But fuck sakes James you can't think that just because things are changing that I'm going to leave you guys. Do you know why I wanted this house so much?" He shook his head.

"When I found this house and how big it is and how much land it has I knew was perfect for us. For all of us and I'm not going to ask y'all to leave. I'm not going to ask you guys to leave just because I'm having a kid, there is plenty enough room for all of us. Hell even whichever one you starts a family next there will be enough room. And I doubt that we're all going to want to live together but I will build three houses out there so we can be together. I'm in it for the long haul."

"You mean that?"

"Of course I do asshole. The four of us have been together way too long to end now, and I love you guys too much and you know my deepest darkest secrets." He laughed and leaned in and hugged me.

"I'm sorry about what I said; I guess I was just scared. I didn't mean what I said."

"I figured as much and I forgive you and I'm sorry about hitting you"

"It's ok. I don't think it did too much damage."

"Shut up Diamond. Your gonna have to apologize to Camille."

"I know and I will." He looked down and sighed.

"Look James we're growing up and things are changing but it's a part of life."

"I know but I feel like I'm stuck like I haven't really changed since we moved out here."

"You have and you haven't"

"Don't confuse me."

"Your still the same loyal, protective, hot headed jackass that I've know my whole life and you're still a man whore. Less now then you used to be. But still"

"Thankyou Kendall." He shoved me but still let out a laugh.

"But you're smarter now and less self centered, you've really grown up James."

"It's getting late we should head in."

"Yea" I started walking up the stoop when my muscles started protesting.

"We are too old for this"

"Afraid you're gonna get your ass beat one day"

"No I can still kick somebody's ass if I need to, like I just did Diamond. But with hockey and then all the running around I'm going to do with the baby, I don't think my body is going to be able to handle it. I'm too old. We all are except for Carlos. I think that kids going to have the energy of a five year old for the rest of his life."

"Yea maybe. I think I'm too old for this boy band shit." I stop in my tracks and turn to look at him.

"You're thinking about quitting BTR."

"Not quitting per say, Logan and I have talked about, we're twenty three almost twenty four. We're just getting old. We've talking about retiring maybe doing one last tour then that's it. I can make my main priority on my acting and Logan can start focusing on his writing."

"Wait writing. What are you talking about?" I knew Logan wrote, but always just as a hobby.

"He got offered a job with some magazine he's thinking about taking it."

"Why didn't I know?"

"Because we've all been way to damn busy, to just sit down and talk."

"Yea we have, haven't we?"

"Yep. But we're thinking one more tour and maybe cd and then that's it. Carlos agreed."

"Well whatever you guys decide, me and Camille will be there cheering you on and once the baby gets here so will she."

"You really love her don't you?"

"More than you'll ever understand." I don't think I've ever loved one person more as I do Camille.

When we got inside Logan was watching tv with Carlos and Camille was nowhere to be seen.

"Where's Camille?"

"Up in y'alls room." I started to make my way up there when I was stopped by James.

"I'm gonna go talk to her."

"Ok, please don't make her cry."

"I won't." He ran off as I went to go get something to drink.

I really hope all this drama shit is over with. I don't know how if I can handle anymore of it.

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><p><strong><em>review please<em>**

**_b._**


	6. don't listen

**_a/n: thankyou to everyone who reviewed last chapter :)_**

**_I didn't actually think I was going to be able to write this, but I did. _**

_**I'm not too sure how good it is, I wrote it in the two hours I had coming back from my mini road trip but I hope y'all like it.**_

_**warning: cussing and fridge punching **_

_**words: 2,329**_

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><p><em><strong>The man you don't have to be<strong>_

**_Don't listen _**

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><p>It's been two weeks since Camille moved in and all the shit with James and Logan happened. We've all gotten along and settled a pattern with each other. James and Camille are still a little tense with each other but there working it out. The last three of my games have been home games, so I could get Camille moved in and settled. There were no more problems with anyone, well Carlos had a mini freak out when he found out about the baby, but that was more like he was afraid that he wasn't going to get attention and people would forget about him but he got over it when we told him that some things would change, but he could never be forgotten, I'm pretty sure it's impossible.<p>

A few days later Gustavo and Kelly came over and talked to us about one last tour and c.d. We decided that it would happen in a few weeks and I would do the c.d. and the first concert in Minnesota and the last one back in L.A. The Minnesota date would be the day before the Kings played against the Wild and we're spending three days before the concert and then four days after, we all get to go back home and Katie's coming also. I can't wait to get back home and show Camille where I grew up. I know my mom is excited to see her and she's all excited about the baby. At first she was a little apprehensive about it, but we talked about and I told her how much I love Camille and that I won't be like my jackass of a father, she warmed up to it.

The alarm on my phone went off and I quietly slid out of bed, and made my way to the shower trying my hardest not to wake Camille. Four a.m. is way too early to be up, but I'm doing what I love and I don't really mind waking up this early, except for the whole waking up before Camille thing.

"Hey" a soft groggy voice came from behind me. I turned away from my dresser to an utterly gorgeous Camille. I swear that women looks beautiful always. She pulled herself up the bed, yawning and trying to adjust to the light.

"Babe did I wake you?" I slipped on a pair of jeans and a shirt and walked over to her.

"No, I couldn't sleep"

"I'm sorry babe."

"I know you have practice. But you'll be back by eleven thirty right?" Today we're going to see if we can find the sex of the baby.

"Of course, I'll be here; I'm not going to miss it for the world, and then we can go to lunch and then go baby shopping." A large smile made its way to her face, she's wanted to go baby shopping forever, but we decided to wait until we find out. I looked down at her and she's the most beautiful girl in the world. I got up and ran to get my camera.

"Babe come back, where are you going?" I came back with my camera and she pouted.

"Nooooo…."

"Whyyyyy?" I copied her whine.

"I look gross."

"Oh hush, you do not."

"I do, my hair's a mess, I have no makeup on and I'm fat."

"You're hair is beautiful, you never need makeup and you're pregnant not fat." I ran my hand through her hair and the other over her growing stomach, when she pulled back she lay back on the bed and I took the chance to take a picture of her.

"Ugh, Kendall. I don't get it, two weeks ago you could barely tell I was pregnant and now it's like 'hello here I am' it's ridicules" I shook my head, and pulled her onto my lap.

"Babe you look amazing, I promise you. It's not ridicules at all ok Your over five months pregnant, I was actually beginning to wonder if you'll ever show. You look amazing."She looked at me pouting.

"Whatever you say"

"I have to go, I love you ok." This isn't the first time I said it, but it still sends a shiver up my spine every time.

"Ok love you, see you at eleven thirty?"

"Yep." With that I kissed her, by the time I turned off the light she was fast asleep.

"Love you baby" I whispered even though I knew she wouldn't hear me.

"Love you too, kill 'em" She whispered back and then fell asleep I laughed and shut the door.

* * *

><p>After a killer practice I rushed home to get Camille. I just can't wait to find out what we're having. I walked into the kitchen where a sober looking Logan was making some food and Carlos was on the phone, shouting at whoever was on the other end in Spanish.<p>

"Hey what's up" Logan looked up and grabbed a magazine the counter before walking over to me.

"Uh hey… there's something you need to see."

"Ok, you're being weird. Where's Camille?"

"She's upstairs with James." Anger flashed across my face, before I could go to our room and see what was going on Carlos grabbed my arm.

"What the fuck is going on?"

"Here just look." Logan handed me the magazine that was behind his back. I looked at the page he marked, confused as to why Logan and Carlos were acting strange. I looked down to a picture of Camille and me making out, only to realize that it was from when we're back at the palmwoods and then a picture of her and Jack walking down the beach holding hands and looking like a couple. I read highlighted pieces from an unnamed source that Camille was pregnant and has been sleeping the both of us and doesn't even know who the child's father is and after Jack "broke up" with her I only stayed with her because I pity her. I threw the magazine down and punched the fridge. Not the smartest thing to do ever, but I'm pissed. And I know exactly who that so called unnamed source is.

"Son of bicth"

"Dude you really need to get your anger in check." I gave Carlos a 'what the fuck look', just as Logan hit him.

"Thankyou" I spat out, holding my hand to my chest.

"What are you gonna do?" I sat down while Logan gave me ice for my hand and turned to Carlos.

"First I'm gonna go see how Camille is and then I'm going to take her to find out the sex of the baby and then I'm going to beat the shit out of Jack."

"You might not need to do that" I turned to Carlos who looked like he was thinking.

"What?"

"I think I have an idea on how to get back at him without you going to jail." I looked at him skeptically, but he's right the last thing we need is for me to get arrested for fighting again.

"I don't know Carlos"

"Give him a chance Kendall" I looked over at Logan who seemed to be thinking the same thing as Carlos

"Ok"

"I just need to make some calls and then he'll wish he was never born"

"Thanks, I need to go see Camille."

This is going to be a long day.

_**Camille.**_

I can't believe Jack would say this, I just know it's him and he has the balls to make himself out to be the innocent person. He called me a slut in a magazine that all my fans read. I've been getting calls all day, from my manager, the studio, my co anchor all wanting to know if it was true and then my mother called and chewed me out, I can't believe she doesn't believe me. After the third magazine called James took my phone and chucked it out a window. Now I'm sitting here crying my eyes out on James's shoulder waiting for Kendall to get home. I have no clue how he's going to react.

James' says something and then slips his arm from my waist, I'm about to stand up when I notice someone else pulling me onto their lap. I look up and see Kendall. When I look into his anger filled eyes, I start to cry harder and nestle my face into the crook of his shoulder.

"Cami, stop" I looked up his face as I tried to control my tears.

"No one is going to believe this."

"You don't know that"

"I do, everyone knows that Jack is just a jealous jackass who hates losing."

"I ruined you're life." I got out between tears; Kendall leaned down and kissed my forehead. I really do think I ruined his life.

"No you didn't Cami, I love you and this baby, if you did anything it was making my life better."

I continued to sob as he held me closer.

"Logan and Carlos and probably James now too have something up there sleeve. And listen if anyone believes this shit, then their idiots. And sitting her crying is letting them win." All I could do is nod and wipe away my tears.

"Look go and get dressed, I know you don't want to miss this appointment." He kissed my forehead and walked out of the room as I changed. God I never wanted this to get out, when the baby was older I wanted to be able to tell her/him on my own not for her/him to learn from old magazines. Now I dragged Kendall into this to. I know he said that he wants to be here but I wonder if it would be easier if I left. But then I would let Jack win and I would never forgive myself for hurting Kendall. I love him way to much for that to happen.

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><p>We've been sitting here in the doctors waiting forever the doctor. I try so hard not to cry. As we were waiting in the waiting room people kept looking at me, some were skeptical and kept giving me encouraging looks while others looked at me like I was the worst thing to walk the earth.<p>

"Stop thinking about it Camille. Their assholes, we know the truth and that's what matters."

Just as I was about to say something the nurse Lucy walked in.

"Hello hello how is everything?" She smiled and walked over to the table.

"Fine"

"Good now who is this?" She looked at Kendall and smiled.

"I'm Kendall"

"Nice to meet you. Is it safe to say that you're the father?" I don't know if it was just because she didn't recognized him because of the beanie and hoodie he was wearing or she just didn't know who he was, but it made me feel so much better.

"It is" I replied and she smiled and continued with the appointment.

"Well you are a very lucky man Kendall. Camille is a special girl."

"I am and she is." I smiled Kendall and lay back as Lucy brought out the tape measure and measured me.

"Alright that looks good. Want to hear the heartbeat?"

"Of course" I heard it once already but I know Kendall wants to hear it to. I can hardly contain my excitement as she gets me ready and runs the wand over the stomach. At first I couldn't hear anything.

"Why can't we hear anything" I looked over at Kendall who had worried written all over his face.

"Just be patient. And there it is." A steady bump-bump filled the room and I smiled and Kendal squeezed my hand.

"Oh my god. Camille that's our baby." I smiled when he said that and my heart soared.

"I know, oh my gosh Kendall." Just as he leaned in to kiss me another steady beat filled the room, I'm pretty sure that's not my heartbeat.

"What is that? Is that Camille's?"

"No sir. It seems that you're having twins." I squealed and Kendall started crying.

"Wait why didn't I hear both of them when I first heard the heart beat?"

"Well it seemed that this little guy is a very good hider. It happens."

"Did you say he?" I looked at the screen as Lucy moved the wand around.

"I sure did. Here's your little boy and…" She moved the wand around a little more until she found what she was looking for. "Here's your little girl." Two babies. One boy and one girl. Oh god I can't wait.

"Twins" I looked up at Kendall who's smiling like an idiot.

"Twins" I repeated. Lucy cleaned me up and then told us we were free to go.

"Oh and Camille" I turned back to her only to be pulled into a hug.

"Don't listen to what other people are saying about you. You know the truth and that's all that matters." I hugged he back, happy to know that at least one person besides our family isn't an idiot.

After I signed papers and made my next appointment, we left. I was still pissed about the article but finding out that we're having twins just made everything better.

* * *

><p>When we got to Kendall's truck he picked me up spun me around.<p>

"TWINS. WE'RE HAVING TWINS." I had laughed at Kendall's outburst. He sat me down, placed his hands on both sides of my face and brought his lips to mine. I responded wrapping my arms around his neck and getting as close to him as possible. I moaned as he slipped his tongue in my mouth and slid his hands into the back pocket of my jeans and lifted me back off the ground. I didn't care about the flashes we heard behind us or the questions people were yelling at us. All I care about is Kendall and our new family.

Everyone else who wants to judge us before getting to know the real truth can suck it.

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><p><strong><em>an: thankyou for reading I hoped y'all liked it._**

**_review please. and let me know what your favorite part was._**

**_b. _**


	7. cold as stone

**_a/n: I know this was supposed to be up yesterday but I had trouble breathing yesterday and I was in the hospital for forever_**

**_so I hope y'all like this chapter_**

**_warnings: cussing, mentions of shower sex, mentions of pass abuse, the last part of the chapter is sad._**

**_words: 2,753_**

**_disclaimer: I don't own the story only the plot and the title of the chapter comes from the song Cold As Stone by Lady Antebellum. play at the last part of this chapter when Kendall is talking about his father. the song is about lovers but I think it could go well with this chapter._**

**_enjoy b._**

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><p><em><strong>The man you don't have to be<strong>_

_**Cold as stone**_

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><p>We drive through the gate and up to the house still on a high from finding about the babies. I'm still nervous about the media, but apparently James, Carlos, and Logan have it handled. We parked and then went into the house where cameras and media crew were working.<p>

"What do you think is going on?" I turned to and Kendall and asked.

"I have no clue. Let's go find Carlos." He pulls me close to him and tucked me under his arm. Sometimes I swear he thinks that if he doesn't keep me close I disappear. I actually find it cute. I feel safe when he does it. We make our way into the kitchen where James and Logan are talking to some people and Carlos is talking to Kelly.

"Hey guys what's up?"

"Oh good you're here. I already have a press conference set up." Carlos ran up to us and pulled me into a hug. I love this kid and his hugs.

"What's going on Carlos?"

"So a couple of people owed me some favors ok?" I looked at him incredulously, knowing Carlos you wouldn't want to know how he got those favors.

"What people?"

"The news ladies' from channel's three, five and nine and Lacy from people"

"Why do they owe you all these favors?" Of course Kendall would want to know.

"Well, Noelle from channel from three had me come over one night…"

"You know what never mind Carlos we don't need to know." Carlos looked at us confused and then smacked Kendall on his shoulder and laughed.

"Not like that you pervert…" Kendall pointedly and opened his mouth to say something before he was interrupted.

"Ok a little like that but never mind. Anyways I called them told them what happened and the truth." I gasped and looked over had Kendall who had the same shocked expression on his face that I did. I didn't want people to know the truth. As far as I'm concerned the only people that need to know the truth is Kendall, the boys, Mama Knight and Katie, and my parents.

"Don't worry. I told them that yes you are pregnant and that Kendall is the father. They don't need to know that it's not biological. Only that he is the father, which he is."

"Yea I am." I smiled at this. Kendall is doing something I'm not sure many other men would do.

"But anyways I also told them that you two were never really together and that it was all for publicity. You guys 'broke it of' and then you started dating Kendall but you guys didn't want anyone to find out." As Carlos continued to talk people swarmed us and got us ready to go.

"Oh thank you Carlos." As he said this I couldn't help but feel like we're lying.

"Wait I'm not done. I was on the phone with my dad and I told him what happened. Well when I told him Jack's name he said it sounded familiar. So he did a search and guess what?" We just stood there waiting for him to continue.

"What Carlos."

"Right we'll he's had charges brought against him for abuse against three other girlfriends."

"What?"

"Yea they were all dropped because he paid the girls off."

"Why didn't he do that with Camille?"

"I don't know. He's probably scared of you Kendall."

"True. He is pretty intimidating?"

"Only for the ones I love babe." He smiled and kissed my head and Carlos laughed.

"Awe so sweet anyways as I was saying, this isn't the first time he's done something like this. Everyone knows that he's violent but no one knows that he likes to beat on women." He didn't have to say anything for me to know what he was implying.

"I don't know Carlos."

"Babe he could of killed you or the babies."

"I know but I don't know." I know what he has done is wrong, but two wrongs don't make a right.

"Look women have the right to know about this guy, they have the right to know not to get involved with him."

"I know. I know what he did was wrong and then he didn't have a right to say anything about me and you but I feel like I'll being doing something wrong and lying to everyone."

"Look we don't have to tell them the truth only what you want ok? They'll only know what you them to know ok? And you won't be lying ok. People don't need to know everything."

"Ok. All I want them to know is that we're together and that I'm pregnant and what an ass Jack is."

"Ok then that's what they'll know." I looked at Carlos and smiled.

"Ok I have to go and let everyone know y'all are ready." He hugged me again and then shook Kendall's hand and then scurried off. He'd be really good in PR.

"You'll be right next to me right?" I still feel wrong, but I guess he's right about this.

"Of course babe. Every step of the way." I stood up and straightened my dress I was shoved in and took Kendall's hand in mine. We walked out together, hand in hand, not know what the next half hour was going to hold, but at least we're together.

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><p>After the conference we went out for dinner and just hung out at the beach like old times. It's something we all needed. Family, drinks, the stars and the boys all jamming out together. It was amazing, than it started to rain. And damn I thought this was California, it's supposed to be all warm and sunny. But it gave Kendall another excuse for him to wrap his arms around me as we ran to his truck. Like he needs any anyways.<p>

After we got home everyone went their separate ways.

"Babe I'm going to take a shower" I told Kendall as he sat down to watch a hockey game. The interview went well today, no one asked any stupid questions or said anything stupid. A few people asked about Jack but Kendall took care of it and the truth came out about how much of a sleaze ball he is. One thing does replay in my mind over and over again.

"_**So Kendall…" A woman in a bright purple dress, wearing way to much red lipstick asked.**_

"_**Is there a wedding in the future?"**_

"_**Um…" he took my hand and smiled, squeezing his hand. **_

"_**Yea I think there is. I don't know when but I want to make this girl right here a Knight. I want to spend forever with her."I blocked everything out and just stared at him. We haven't talked about it, but I know this is the guy I want to spend the rest of my life with.**_

That has been replaying in my mind all day. We haven't about it yet, but when he said it I knew he was for real about this whole thing.

The bathroom door opens and closes and then the shower door open to reveal a very sexy shirtless Kendall.

"Hey" I licked my lips and checked him out.

"Wanna join?" He smirked and shimmed out of his jeans and steps into the shower, wrapping his arms around my waist and hungrily crashing his lips to mine.

This is going to be fun.

**Kendall **

After our super happy fun time in the shower Camille got out while I finished cleaning up. Just to let you know that was one of the best showers ever. After everything today I just want to sleep. A lot. All this stress needs to stop, we don't need it anymore. I already have enough. I try to keep it from Camille but I know soon it's all gonna come out. I shut of the shower off and towel off and walk into my room where Camille is slipping into a pair of shorts and tank top. This pregnancy has been so good to her; I mean she's normally hot but now just damn. She's got curves in all the right places, she's just looks awesome. And she does this thing where she's facing the wall and she'll slip on her clothes all slow and her hips sway and I swear I don't think I've ever seen anyone put on clothes so sexual, but she does and it's amazing. I'm pretty sure she does it on purpose. I slip on a pair of boxers and throw myself onto my bed. I'm scared. But I don't know what to say.

"Babe what's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Don't lie." I look up at Camille who now is sitting on my lap.

"What if I'm not a good dad?" She knows it's something I'm worried about, it all ways has been.

"You know you're gonna be an amazing father. Babe you already are." I looked up at her, I guess she's right but still, my mom said the same thing to my dad and that did not end well.

"You are nothing like your dad Kendall." I was silent. People have told me ever since I was thirteen that I wasn't like my father, but sometimes when I look in the mirror all I see is him staring back at me.

"Talk to me Kendall." I sighed and pulled her down to me.

"What if I turn out like him, everyone already knows that I have anger issues. What if I just get so angry I snap and I take it out on you or one of the kids?"

"Kendall listen to me. Your dad was an asshole who didn't care about anyone but himself. And I know that harsh but it's the truth. And yea you get angry easily but you know when it's too much. You're gonna be here for the babies because you don't break your promises because that's who you are. Kendall your dad didn't think about the consequences of his actions he just did it. You're not like that; maybe when you were younger yea, but you've grown you're a man because your mother raised you that way. She brought you up to be an amazing person who loves and cares. She made sure that you were a better man than your father. You're strong and smart and protective. Baby look the scars are still there but he's gone and he's never coming back, so don't let how you remember him let your fears get the best of you."

I thought about what she said. My dad was my hero until something changed when Katie turned seven he started drinking every night, he would come home drunk late at night, smelling of other women that weren't my mother and then he got violent but only with me. I tried to fight back, but I was only thirteen and he was bigger than me. The night it ended, was rainy, kind of foreshadowing what was to come. He came home early, Katie was watching TV and I was getting ready for hockey practice, and mom was still at work. He was drunk and pissed off as usual. But this time it was different, he came in quiet, he went after Katie first, attacking her and smacking her around and then finally throwing her down our stairs the he came after me. I got him with my hockey stick and when he came after me again I got him in the ribs with my skates. I ran down the stairs and found Katie bleeding and barely breathing, I picked her up, grabbed the keys to my dad's old pickup, I drove all the way there speeding and crying and praying. When I got there the police were behind me, shouting for me to get out of the truck. I was never more scared in my life then I was at that moment. And I wasn't scared of my father, or the fact that I could've possibly gone to jail but I was scared that Katie would die all because of my father. It still haunts me to this day. And it scares the living daylights out of me that I might turn into him.

"Stop thinking about it Kendall. You are not your father, hell that man doesn't even deserve to be a father. You do Kendall. He's gone for good; he will never hurt you or your family again." She's right he went to jail, I saw him once the day after I turned seventeen I went back to Minnesota and made sure he knew never to come back. Being stubborn he did. He was released a few weeks after I turned eighteen; he came down to California and tried to tell me that he was wrong and that he was sorry. I couldn't accept it, the pain and hate was still strong. We came to blows once again; I would have killed him if Camille hadn't walked into 2j. He never came back again; maybe he finally got the message. I still remember the look in the same emerald green eyes that we share the hate and regret and still the love that was in them. I walked away promising that I wouldn't let him back in, that night I cried for the first time in five years.

"I'm scared Camille."

"Me too babe. You do not know how much it terrifies me that I'll end up like my mother. No one wants to be around that woman because she drove everyone away when she left me and my dad. But I won't let that affect me. Do you want to know how?"

"How?"

"Because I had an amazing father who taught me how to love just like your mother taught you how to be strong. And I also have you. There will be times when life gets too hard but we'll work it out and we'll be the best parents we can be. And babe we have an amazing group of friends and family who will be right next to us if we need it." I don't know how I got so blessed to have someone like Camille in my life. She knows exactly what to say when I need it.

"Why are you so amazing?"

"It's a part of my charm"

"I love you Camille."

"I love you too. You're gonna be an amazing father." I rolled her off of me and tucked our covers over us. Sometimes I wish I was cold as stone when it comes to my father, but I can't. I don't forgive him, I will never forgive, I can't forgive him. He's still my father and I love him, except I only love the man that he use to be. The man who would come to my hockey games and cheer as loud as can be and pull me into his arms after every game no matter if we won or lost, the man that would play the guitar for Katie so she could sleep at night, the man that made it his mission to sing aloud as he possibly could while he twirled my mother around our kitchen, the man who would give me the best advice, the man who love with his whole heart, not the man that I knew, the one who only cares about himself, the man I will never be. I will be that man he was before everything changed for him. I wish I was as cold as stone, I could stand strong and still, watching him walk away. I wouldn't hurt like this, or feel so all alone. But I can't that's the only thing he taught me, was I can't be heartless when it came to my family, even though that's exactly what he was. I know that I will never be like him, because to be like him I would have to never known what it was like to be totally and completely selfless, I would have to not know what it was like to give yourself for someone else, give up your dreams for your best friend, give up your true love for your brothers happiness, I would have to not know what it's like to be truly happy with what you have no matter how big or small. I would have to know what it's like to be cold as stone. But I don't and I'm so thankful for that.

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><p><strong><em><span>an so what did y'all think tell me in a review pretty please_**

**_the next chapter will probably time jump and there will be a lot of drama _**

**_b._**


	8. music, hockey, truth, and scares

_**a/n: well I hope everyone had an awesome halloween I know I did. **_

_**this chapter is very drama-y and a little sad but it had to be done.**_

_**warning: cussing and fighting.**_

_**words without a/n: 2,980**_

_**enjoy.**_

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><p><strong><em>The man you don't have to be<em>**

**_music, hockey, truth, and scares._**

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><p><em><strong>Camille<strong>_

It's been a little over two months since I moved in with Kendall; everything has been going pretty good. I'm finally happy, all the drama with Jack has faded and no one has really bothered us. It's been pretty drama free lately and I hope it stays that way, but I have a feeling that more drama is going to ensue and it probably will have something to do with James. Something's been off with him for a while, he's just not himself and he's been sneaking around a lot. But I guess time will only tell. But right now I'm not going to worry about it. I'm going to worry about the fact that I'm seven months pregnant and I'm about to fly to freaking Minnesota, for the concert and Kendall's game. I'm huge, freezing and uncomfortable and the worst thing is Kendall already flew out three days ago. I couldn't go with him and James, Logan, and Carlos because thanks to Jack the director of the movie re-casted his part so the last two months I have been non-stop filming, which is not easy to do when you're pregnant so I had to stay behind to finish one of the last scenes. So now I'm on a plane to Sherwood with Katie who will not stop giggling.

"Who are texting?" I said probably a little sharper than necessary but who cares.

"Oh no one." She said and started giggling. Thank god these windows don't open or that phone would be in pieces by now.

"Well obviously it's someone Katie. And Mr. No One is annoying. So stop giggling."

"Well Miss. Cranky you just need to calm down."

"I have a right to be cranky." I pull my sweater closer to me, it's the middle of October, a nice seventy-five degrees and here I am in a sweater, jeans and boots and I'm still cold. Damn straight I have a reason to be pissed. I can't wait till we land and I get to see Kendall which won't be till tonight after his game. Stupid hockey.

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><p>After a three hour flight from LAX we landed in Minneapolis, where James was waiting for us. I swear I've never seen him has jumpy when he saw us. He all but pulled Katie into a bone crushing hug, I know something is going on with them. Now here I am sitting in the Knights kitchen while Katie and Mrs. Knight are out shopping, Logan and Carlos are visiting their respective families and Kendall's at practice.<p>

"What's going on with you and Katie?" Time freezes and then James is choking on his coffee. Yep something is defiantly going on.

"Why would you… how could you think that?"

"I see the way how you two act around each other James." Every time the two of them are together it's like no one else matters it's just James and Katie. It's also kind of obvious to everyone to Kendall so either he's been way to busy or he knows that it's going on and he's making himself blind to it.

"Camille, I like her a lot. Just let me handle it. Ok?"

"Alright just be careful. I know you're practically his brother, but he's pretty much raised her and you know how protective of her he is. So just don't do anything James, you don't want to ruin your relationship with him because you know that if it comes to it, Katie's gonna come first James and it's highly likely that you're gonna lose. I know that's mean but that's how it is."

"I know Cami. I know all of that and it scares me because I know that it's true but I'm going to tell him what's going on." I let out a breath of relief and then he started talking again.

"When Katie's comfortable with it."

"You know you could die if you prolong this. I don't think he would think twice about shooting you. You do know that right?"

"I know but look she's not ready yet and neither am I. He still sees her as a little eleven year old who likes to con people out of their money not eighteen year old, beautiful, amazing young women. I will talk to him but not now."

"Well when?"

"After the tour," Oh my god. He is going to die.

"James the tour ends like a week before I'm due."

"I know, but he's all stressed out now with the concerts and all the games that he'll be gone for, for the next two months while you're home here without any of us here with you." He's right Kendall is stressed the next two months the boys will be gone on their last tour and then Kendall has five away games and then with all the baby planning, but you can't prolong the inventible.

"So Camille I'm really doing this for him." I gave him a look and he just backed away.

"Don't wait too long because if you do I'm just gonna have a big bowl 'I told you so' waiting for you when it blows up in your face."

"I know Cam, I'll talk to him."

"Fine but don't wait because I will tell him if you don't."

"I know. I promise I'll talk to Katie and then Kendall."

"Alright just be careful. And tell him when you're standing next to Katie." He gave me a questioning look. Wow this boy could be stupid.

"He probably won't hit you in front of her." He gave and understanding nod and continued to drink his coffee. I stood up and made my way to mine and Kendall's room.

"Where are you going?"

"Bed."

"It's only two."

"I'm tired and I'm fourteen months pregnant." I got a chuckle from James; ever since I found out I was having twins I started to refer to myself as twice as pregnant. It feels like it.

"You're seven months pregnant Camille." He continued laughing as I threw something at him. They don't understand what it's like to carry to gigantic babies who think their soccer players around.

"Well next time your seven months pregnant with twins we'll talk. Alright?"

"I can't wait. Love you Cami."

"Stop being a dick." As I walked up the stairs I heard James laughing his fool head off. He's such a jerk.

"I'm going to wake you up at five thirty so we can leave by six thirty."

"That's so early." I whined, lately I've been so tired. Like I know it's normal but something just doesn't feel right.

"Well you take a long time to get ready." Well that's the pot calling the kettle black.

"Suck it Mr. I need my hair to be super perfect so I can just go to the market." I snicker as I walk up the stairs.

"Don't be mean." I laugh and shut the bedroom door, laying on our bed, tucking myself into one of Kendall's hoodies.

I can't wait to see Kendall, and for this game and concert is over and these babies are born. I just want to meet them and start our family.

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><p>The game and concert is finally over and now we get a few days to spend in Sherwood before we go back. The Kings won two – three, Kendall was pretty happy that he added another win to his career, but everyone else was upset that the Wild lost on their own turf. Logan, James and Carlos all got to sing the National Anthem, while Kendall stood behind them with his team mates. I sat with Mrs. Knight, Katie, the Garcia's, the Mitchell's and the Diamonds. Let's just say I am so done with people touching my stomach, it is just a bump for god sakes, a very awesome, precious bump. But it's not going to go away anytime soon. This whole weekend Jen has been fawning over the babies, she took me out to lunch and gave me two blankets that she made from Kendall's old baby blanket. She's so excited about these babies; this whole damn family is so amazing and perfect.<p>

Katie and James still haven't told Kendall, which tells me that they're going to drag this on and it's only going to cause a big explosion. The concert was pretty much amazing, I got to watch from the wings as they sang and Kendall even brought me out on stage. It was pretty awesome. Now that he's rested, which is a good thing, angry sleep deprived Kendall's are not fun, we're out and about town. He took me down to this old diner for breakfast, showed me where him and James use to play before they met Carlos and Logan, then we went to their old school and then the ice rink, and just so you know it is never a good idea to put a pregnant women on ice skates it's not safe, I didn't fall I just clutched onto Kendall for dear life. After that he took me down to this old lake that they grew up at, and now we're on our way back to his house.

When we pull up Jen is sitting outside on the swing knitting something and talking to Brooke. Kendall helps up to the porch and sitting me down in a rocking chair next to the two women before running into the house to get me a blanket.

"So Camille" I turned to her the best I could, all the while trying to ignore slamming of doors back in the house.

"I was thinking tomorrow or tuseday with you and Katie and the boys being here we could have a dinner, I was thinking a little family get together so everyone could see the boys and Katie and to get to know you and also a little celebration of the babies, kind of like a baby shower." That is a really good idea, I know it would make Kendall happy to see everyone before the babies are born and I know I would like to meet the rest of his family. I open my mouth to say something just as a loud bang and shouting are heard from inside. Jen and Brooke help me up and lead me into the living room where a shirtless jean clad James is fighting with Kendall, Katie who is only in shorts an oversized shirt is standing by the stairs yelling at the two boys in front of us. Kendall pulls his arm back and clocks James' right in the jaw. I don't think I've ever seen Kendall as angry as he is now.

Oh my god. They are so fucked.

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><p><strong>Kendall<strong>

Another win, an amazing concert, I'm back home, I get to see my family and see my old friends and get to hang out with my mom and James, Logan, Carlos, and Katie without any interruptions and a day with my girl, life is pretty amazing, I'm pretty sure nothing could go wrong. After lunch I drive Camille and I back home. We've hardly been able to spend any time together, with all my rehearsals and practices, her re-shooting the movie and photo shoots, it's nice just to be together, especially since in a little more than two months we're gonna have two little ones. I can't wait but I'm still nervous, but I know Camille is tired of being pregnant. I can't blame her, she's tired all the time and lately she hasn't been feeling good, but I know she's just as excited as I am.

I help her from the car to the porch where my mom and James' mom is talking. I kiss her forehead and left her with them so I could go get her a blanket. I walked into the silent house, Carlos was out running and Logan was out with his family. Most of the friends that Katie still had here were off at school, so she should be around here somewhere and James said that he was going to spend the day with his mom who was out front but he was nowhere to be seen. Maybe they're out together, I'm not stupid I know something is going on with them and I'm pissed that neither of them has the ball's to tell me. I mean really do they think I would freak out that much if I found out that they're together? I mean I probably will get pissed, and not because they're seeing each other, but because they've waited so long in telling me. I get it I do, if you want to be with a person, you're going to be with that person, but don't keep secrets from that person's best friend/brother.

After getting a blanket from the closet I walked down the hallway past my old room and then past Katie's room. I stop when I hear Katie giggling and then someone with a louder deeper voice laughing back. I step closer to door, hearing more giggling and then a moan.

I slam the door open only to see a half naked James hovering over my equally as dressed baby sister. Katie looks over at me; horror washing over her face, James slowly turns his body and wrenches his eyes shut when he notices me. He slides off of Katie's bed slipping on his jeans

"Kendall" He pleads grabbing a blanket to cover up Katie.

"You're fucking dead Diamond." I slammed the door and walked to the living room where I begin pacing. If I know James and I do, which is why I should have expected this, he will be out here in;

Five.

Four.

Three.

Two.

One.

"Kendall." I am so good. I turn to where he's standing only a few feet in front of me with Katie standing behind him. I clench and unclench my hands trying to calm myself down. I am going to do everything I can to handle this reasonably and not lose my best friend and my little sister.

"Before we get into this I need you to calm down." I looked at the scared look on my little sister's face and then to James. He was right I need to be calm so I am.

"I'm fine, I'm cool." I raise my hands up in the air telling them that I'll be fine, then James around and gives Katie a smile. She blushes and I lose it. I pull back my arm and punch James in the nose.

"THIS IS NOT CALM KENDALL." James shrieked while holding his face.

"Well I am so sorry. But I can't help it she's my little sister. Why James? Why my little sister?"

"I'm not a little girl anymore Kendall and I made the decision to be with him too."

"How long has this been going on?" I looked over at James who looked back at Katie.

"Almost two months." I punched him and this time he punched me back, I slammed him against the wall and brought my arm back punching him straight in the jaw. They've been hiding this for two months. A door slammed and I could hear Camille gasp and my mom yelling at us.

"Two fucking months James. You've been sleeping with Katie for two months. You couldn't find another girl to get off on" I was interrupted by James pushing me back into the wall behind me.

"She's not some random fuck Kendall. She never was." I looked over at Katie who was silently crying.

"What are you talking about?"

"I love Katie, Kendall. I have for a while."

"Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"How in the world was I going to tell my best friend that I was falling for his little sister, especially when she's only seventeen? Do you know how hard it was to see her everyday and not be able to do something?"

"You've liked her ever since she was seventeen?" I didn't need a response to already know the answer.

"What about you Katie?" She shrugged her shoulders and smiled.

"I love him Kendall." I saw the happiness in their eyes, I should be happy for them, and I guess I am but two months of them not telling me, I looked back at them, letting my anger take over me.

"TWO MONTHS. TWO FUCKING MONTHS AND YOU GUYS COULDN'T TELL ME." I started towards James again when I heard a sharp gasp behind me.

"Kendall…" I turned around just in time to catch Camille before she crashed onto the floor. I sat down and pulled her onto my lap, trying to find her pulse. I did and it was faint. Her skin is paling and her breathing is slow and shallow and she burning up. There was commotion behind me and then James was at my side.

"There was an accident on Tejon, the street is backed up, they said it can take anywhere from twenty minutes to almost an hour for an ambulance to get here." I have no clue what's going on but I cannot wait that long.

"Fuck it." I scooped up Camille in my arms and ran out the door to my pickup. Even though I don't want James anywhere near me, I don't put up a fight when he helps me and Camille into the passenger's side and then race's to the other side got in and sped off.

I almost lost her once five years ago, and then I could have lost her a few months ago. That is not happening now. As James speeds down the road I look down at Camille whose eyes are fluttering open and shut, a tear slips down my face and lands on her shoulder. James continues down the road as I hold my Camille close, I can't lose her or these babies. I'll lose myself if that happens.

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><p><strong><em><span>an: ohmygod! ahh!_**

**_whats gonna happen? Well I guess you'll find out next chapter._**

**_review, pretty please. :)_**

**_b._**


	9. Dear God save me I'm falling

_**a/n: chapter nine. I would have posted this earlier but I decided to re-write the first two chapters of another story I'm working on and I needed to make some decisions for this chapter. but then I made them and pretty much worked on this all saturday. I didn't even think that this chapter would be as long as it is, but I;m glad that I could get it to be this long and still be good.**_

_**so** **the part of Camille's POV that's bold and italic is a flashback to five years ago. it's what camille's thinking of during the whole thing. **_

_**warnings: cussing and a wee bit of fighting. **_

_**word count without a/n: 3,020. oh yes **_

**_I hope you enjoy this chapter._**

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><p><em><strong>The man you don't have to be<strong>_

_**Dear God save me I'm falling.**_

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><p>When we were younger, before we all moved to L.A. after our families went to bed and the world was quiet, Logan, James, Carlos and I would all sneak out, steal a few beers and then sneak out my dad's old pickup and take it to the back roads. We would go as fast as we could, music pounding, and get drunk off our asses, it's the stupidest thing the four of us did. But every turn, every pass would take us to anywhere in the town in a matter of minutes.<p>

It took us five minutes to get to the hospital, under a minute for her to be taken from me and rushed passed the doors, leaving me behind. Now three and a half hours later I'm in a waiting room just like I was four months ago, knowing nothing. Logan, Carlos, Katie and my mom are all gathered around waiting with me. James is sitting across from me, running his hands over his face and through his hair.

We haven't said a word to each other since we got here. I don't really know what to say to him anyways, my girlfriend is in the hospital and I have no clue what's going on with her, she's barely eight months along, the twins are not ready to be born yet and I'm scared shitless. Why did this have to happen? She still has another five weeks and one day until she's due. They can't come yet, they're still too little. I can't lose them; I'm not going to lose them. No they're gonna be here with me and Camille and we're going to be the best parents we can be. We're gonna be there for every hockey game and every recital, I'm gonna walk that little girl down the aisle and watch on as Camille fusses over our boy. But I can't help feel like something is incredibly terribly wrong.

"Kendall stop" I looked up at my mother who laid her hand on my bouncing knee. I try not to think of the worse but I couldn't help it. I look at the hole on the wall and then at my black and blue knuckles, trying to stop the tears that roll down my face.

"Mama I'm scared." It came out soft as a whisper, tears rolling down my face. The next thing I knew my mother was kneeling in front of me and wiping away my tears.

"I know baby. But Camille's a strong girl and so are those babies. These doctors know what they're doing."

"What if something happens though, what if the three of them don't make it?"

"Don't think like that Kendall, Camille and those babies will make it." James got up from his seat and stepped closer to me.

"How do you know James? That's not something you can promise." I growled at him, standing up and moving into his space.

"Kendall I'm not promising you anything, but I know Camille, she's strong…" I pushed him to nearest wall. He wrapped his arms around me when I started pounding on his chest.

"How do you know James? How do you know? How?" I roared as I slammed my fists into his chest. He pulled me closer and let me cry.

It may not be the manliest thing ever but I just sobbed and sobbed, while James rocked us side to side, rubbing my back, telling me that it will be ok. Logan and Carlos were holding on to mom and Katie who were crying just as hard. I'm pretty sure we looked like a crazy ass mess to the other people in the room but right now I could care less. I feel like I'm falling, but I'll never hit the ground, I've felt like that before but Camille was there to save me. The door opened and someone cleared their throat.

"I'm looking for Camille Robert's family." I pulled myself away from James and turned to the entry way where a doctor was standing.

"Uh me… us. We're…uh… we're her… uh family." I walked forward, wiping my face with the back of my hand. When it dropped James picked up and squeezed it. Not only two hours ago I was pushing him up against a wall, punching him and seriously thinking about killing him and now at this moment he's the only thing keeping me from falling.

"I'm Doctor Scotts." I look up at the tall blond women, still wearing bloody scrubs.

"Is everything ok, Camille, the babies?" Dear god please let everything be ok. Let her be ok.

She took a deep breath and looked down, closing her eyes. My mother let out a choked sob and Katie began crying harder. I took a deep breath trying to fill my lungs, but it didn't happen and then everything went black.

"Kendall"

**Camille.**

The pain is unbearable, I can't even describe it and the worst thing is I don't even really know what's going on. I can't see anything and I can barely hear Kendall's voice. All I know is that I'm scared and cold and I hurt like a bitch. And my babies, it's too soon for my babies to be here. These last eight months I've worked so hard for them. And the last four months with Kendall, every laugh, every movie, every tear, every fight (even though there haven't really been that many) have been so amazing. We've worked hard getting everything ready, the baby's room, the two of us taking off of work; I am not giving up these babies without a fight.

"Cami baby stay with me. We're almost there. Ok?" I tried so hard to answer him but the pain is too much.

"You can't leave me, not yet. Cami we haven't even had a life together yet. I love you. Don't leave me Camille. You can't."

I try so hard to answer, to move, to make a sound, anything. The truck comes to a screeching halt and then I'm being laid down on a table. It's all too much, my breathing starts to slow and it's getting harder to breathe. Kendall's hand is ripped from mine and then I can't hear his or James' voice.

There's shouting and commotion and needles in my arm and tubes up my nose and one down my throat and then nothing.

It's black and cold and scary and silent and I really want Kendall right now.

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><p><strong>Flashback<strong>

_**I walk down a road in the dead of night, tears streaming down my face, and sobs racking my body. A truck pulls up next to me and rolls down the window.**_

"_**Cami…" I look forward, keeping up my pace as I continue down the street.**_

"_**Go home."**_

"_**Babe come on get in the truck."**_

"_**No. Just go home Kendall." I can't deal with this. The summer is coming to an end and I still haven't told Kendall how I feel. And these last three months have been some of the best three months ever. Even with Kendall's dad coming back. That just showed me how passionate Kendall is. But now everyone is coming home. Logan, Carlos and James are coming back in a few days along with Katie and Mrs. Knight. The boys were moving out of the palmwoods and into their own place as were Mrs. Knight and Katie. I got a big role in an up and coming movie that's taking me to the other side of the country. Everything was changing and I wasn't a fan of it. But it has to happen. **_

_**And with that change brought back Jo Taylor. She was supposed to be my best friend. She was the first to know of my crush over Kendall and yet she still dated. She told me once they started dating that I should have taken the chance with him when I had one, but I didn't, so that meant Kendall was fair game. Oh my god I wanted to punch her in the face so hard and then beat her with a stick until she cried.**_

_**I hated her so much, but she was right, I had my chance and I let it go. But that doesn't mean you just rip out your best friend's heart, stomp on it, shoot it, cut it up, set it on fire and then pour lemon juice on it. Then she had the audacity to still want to be friends with me. That bitch.**_

"_**Cam it's gonna start storming, I want you to get back in the truck and then we can go back and talk about it."**_

"_**You don't know what you want Kendall." I screamed at him. I took off running down the road. Kendall started yelling at me to stop and come back. I don't care about the rain drenching my dress, or the fact that I'm freezing, or my shoes are going to be ruined I just keep running.**_

_**I heard the truck cut off, a door slam and then heavy footsteps. That's ok I want him to follow me, I want him to chase after me and catch me. I need to know that he really does love me. I need to know that these last three months weren't for nothing. I need to know that what I just saw wasn't real.**_

"_**Camille. Stop." My arm was taken a hold of and I was spun around and slammed into Kendall's chest.**_

"_**Camille talk to me." What was I to say? I just caught my "best friend" almost fucking my boyfriend, and the worst part is this is the second time since she got back that something like this has happened.**_

"_**What do you want me to say Kendall? Huh. She was practically doing you in the lobby."**_

"_**She was not."**_

"_**She had her hand down your pants." It's the truth. I walked into the lobby, just have coming back from a meeting with my manager only to find Jo's hand down Kendall's jeans. As soon as he saw me Jo was on the floor and he was walking towards me, but I was already running out the door.**_

"_**Did you ever think that she forced herself on me?" Actually I hadn't thought of that.**_

"_**No…" I buried my head in his chest. I am so stupid; I know Kendall wouldn't act like this.**_

"_**Camille you know me. You know I wouldn't do something like that." He's right; Kendall's far too loyal to ever done that.**_

"_**I know…" He pushed me back, hands on my shoulder and brought my face up to his. **_

"_**What's going on Camille?"**_

"_**I don't know ok. I'm just freaking out. Everything is changing, I'm going to be leaving for the other side of the country in four days and you're leaving for the next six months. We won't ever see you. I don't want to lose this." He looked down and crashed his lips into mine, pulling me into a searing passion, love filled kiss. It was amazing and ended way too soon and then he opened his mouth and stupid shit came out.**_

"_**It's just a summer Camille. You and I both knew that when we started this." I never really knew how strong I was until that second. I pushed him away from me as hard as I possibly could. Which was actually pretty far, he was almost across the street. I start to walk away but being the guy that Kendall is he grabbed my arm once again and pulled me to him. I don't want to be anywhere near him right now, but I can't seem to pull myself away. How in the world can he say it was just a summer? I mean did the time we spent together mean nothing to him? I thought he loved me just as much as I love him. That jackass.**_

"_**Just a summer? Really? Damnit Kendall."**_

"_**Camille calm down we both knew it was gonna end when you step on that plane on tuseday."**_

"_**You don't get it do you?" I laughed out, he just looked puzzled.**_

"_**Get what Camille?" Dear god, he seriously cannot be this dumb.**_

"_**You can't be this stupid." He just looked at me perplexed. So I did what I did best. I smacked him hard across the face. Even with the sound of the thunder the sound of skin on skin contact could be heard. **_

"_**I'm in love with you, you fucker."**_

"_**Camille…" it came out soft and raspy like he was trying to hold back tears. **_

"_**No I get it Kendall, I really do. I mean we both knew it was gonna end, you were right. We both agreed that this whole thing between us would just be for the summer. Just fun no emotions. But I guess I lied, I started to see something else in you instead of some guy from Minnesota. I began to see you more than just a lay Kendall. I saw how strong you are but yet still how fragile you are. I got to know the real you. So I am so fucking sorry that I fell in love…" Before I knew his lips were on mine. Before I could do anything he was.**_

"_**Camille this isn't easy for me either ok. You do not know how hard this is for me." Tears started streaming down his face and all I wanted to do was wipe them away and bring him into my arms.**_

"_**What's hard for you Kendall?"**_

"_**Knowing that I'm in love with you, but it's not going to work out for us. Knowing that after this all I have to do is flip a page of a magazine or switch on the tv but not being able to walk down the hallway or going up a few flight of stairs to see you. Knowing that other guys will have a chance with you but I don't anymore. I hate it Camille. And for how much I love you I can't justify asking you to put your movie on hold and asking you to come with me." I guess I didn't really think about how he felt. I knew that this wasn't just some fling, maybe at first it was, I know it was for me, but I didn't think about how deep the both of us were in.**_

"_**Why are we so stupid Kendall?" I wrap my arms around him and nestle my face against his neck.**_

"_**Because we're stupid." I chuckled and buried myself closer into him.**_

"_**I love you Camille."**_

"_**I love you."**_

* * *

><p><em><strong>Four days later.<strong>_

_**Today's the day that I leave. I said goodbye to everyone already at the apartments, well not everyone. Kendall got special permission to go to the gate with me. Now I'm tucked into his shoulder waiting to board my fight. **_

"_**I love you Cami. You know that right?"**_

"_**Yea I do. I love you too."**_

"_**Look at me baby" I did what he said and looked up.**_

"_**I believe everything happens for a reason. So if you and I are meant to be somehow we will be. Don't forget that ok." I nod my head and lean up to kiss him. I don't want this to end at all. I don't want to leave him. **_

_**My flight is called and I pull back. Kendall pulls me back into his arms and kisses my forehead, but reluctantly lets me go a minute later.**_

"_**I love you, Kendall."**_

"_**I love you too." I picked up my bag and walked away from him, taking a deep breath willing myself not break. Just before I get to the ticket counter Kendall yells my name. I turn around and he's standing there with a smile on his face.**_

"_**This wasn't just a summer baby, it's for always." I roll my eyes and flash him one more smile.**_

"_**I love you too. And forever." I don't care how cheesy it sounded, I mean it. He smirked and I turn back around, making my way to the ticket counter.**_

_**The next few months might not be too bad. **_

**Flashback end**

* * *

><p>I took a deep breath, finally being able to fill my lungs properly in what felt like forever. I hadn't thought back to five years in forever.<p>

I dread opening my eyes, I know where I am and I'm scared to death that something terrible happened. Something doesn't feel right. I feel like something's missing. My eyes flicker open and I let the blinding white lights take over me before squeezing my eyes shut and then open them, letting them adjust to the light. There's a steady beep coming from a machine in the corner and an I.V. in my arm. I look around the bland white hospital room looking for anything, anyone. I quickly spot Kendall sitting in a chair looking out the window, tears streaking down his face.

"Kendall…" His head snapped over to the direction of where I'm at. I'm surprised that he could even hear me, with how scratchy my voice. He took a deep breath of relief and walked over to my bed, wrapping his arms around me. I hug him back, ignoring the pain in my lower stomach.

"The babies?" I ask hopefully. They need to be ok; I know they'll make it. Even if they're not really Kendall's babies I know they're as strong as him. But something still feels wrong.

He hesitates a minute more and my own tears start flowing. He pulls me close enough to feel his heartbeat race.

"My babies Kendall?" I plead, I need to know what is going on.

"Camille… I… they…" My heart shatters when I look up at his red rimmed eyes and tear stained face. I feel like my world is crashing and burning. I let the tears flow and cry harder than I ever had before. I sit up and bury my head in his shoulder.

Dear god this can't be happing, not now, not when everything was going so right.

* * *

><p><em><strong>an: so I'm thinking this might be one of the last chapters, maybe but I don't know yet.**_

_**but I was thinking about doing like a prequel. a story about their summer, hmmm idk. y'all tell me what you think about it.**_

_**review, pretty please.**_

**_: )_**

**_b._**


	10. always and forever

**_a/n: twp chapters in one day. I decided to just write this up so y'all didn't have to wait anymore.  
><em>**

_**warnings: none really for this chapter, well there are some sadish parts. this whole situation is sad. **_

_**enjoy.**_

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><p><em><strong>the man you don't have to be<strong>_

_**always and forever.**_

* * *

><p>I'm caught before I can hit the floor. I shake it off, ignoring the worries coming from my family I turn back to the doctor.<p>

"What's going on with Camille? Are the babies ok?"

"Camille went into early labor, we tried to slow it down but we ended up having to do an emergency c-section." They're five weeks early. I looked up at the doctor who looks optimistic but I feel like she's not telling me everything.

"What else happened?"

"Camille flat lined twice and your boy wasn't breathing when we delivered and your little girl was also having trouble breathing."

"Oh my god" the room started to spin and my felt like they're on fire.

"But we were able to save them."

"They're alive?" My mom asked.

"Yes they are. All three…"

"Why didn't you tell him that five minutes ago?" It's the wrong time I know but I just started laughing at James outburst.

"James…" Katie warned him, laying her hand on his arm.

"Well I was just asking."

"Thankyou man." He pulled me into a hug, I'm still pissed at him but him dating Katie really isn't the biggest problem ever. I let him go and him and Katie went to the others while I talked to the doctor.

"As I was saying, all three of them will be ok. The twins are a little small but they should be just fine."

"Camille what happened? Why did she pass out and go into early labor?"

"We're really not sure. This does happen sometimes. I know what she does for a living but has she been under any extra stress lately. But she's ok and so are the babies but I do want to run some test." This is all my fault. I asked to her to come out here right after filming for eight hours straight and then the concert and the game all under forty-eight hours and then there was the fight, James and Katie is family to her just as they are to me. It must have been the breaking point.

"Yea she just got through filming and then flew out here the same day and we've been kind of moving non-stop since Friday."

"What was she doing just before she fainted?"

"She was watching me fight with my best friend."

"Well that could be the cause but I don't really know, her pregnancy was already high risk, with them just being twins. But they're very lucky."

"Thankyou so much. When can I see them?"

"Camille's still in recovery and right now the twins are being taken care of but I'll have a nurse come and get you when you can see them."

"And when will that be?" I couldn't help it, I almost lost my family and well technically I did. I'm anxious I want to see my family.

"Soon. I promise. Kendall they're in great hands nothing's going to happen to them ok?" I nod my head, she's right. Dr. Scotts grew up with my mom and her dad delivered both me and Katie. And a lot of the nurses I knew. We went to school with some and Sherwood is just a small town in general. I smiled back up at her smiling, letting her know that I'm entrusting Camille and the twin's life to her.

I walked back to my family smiling like an idiot.

My mom was the first to spot me. "What did she say?"

"They don't know what caused it but she says she should be ok and the twins will be ok, but they do want to run some test."

"Oh thank god." There was a collective sigh of relief among us and a lot of hugging.

"I knew they would be ok. When can you see them?"

"Camille's still in recovery and the twins are being cleaned up and taken care of but Dr. Scotts said she'll send out a nurse when I can go see them."

"Oh thank god. So do they know what happened?"

"She went into early labor but they don't know what caused it. I told her about how stressful it's been these last few days. She thinks it was because of stress." The same realization of guilt washed over James' face as it did mine a few minuets ago.

"Mom why don't you take Katie home"

"Are you sure sweetie we don't really mind staying"

"No go home, I'll be fine."

"Alright baby. Katie and I will come back later and we'll y'alls things ok?"

"Thank you mom" I pulled her and Katie into a hug.

They said their goodbyes to Logan, James and Carlos.

"You guys don't have to stay if you don't want to"

"We'll stay if you want us to." I smiled and sat down in between the three of them.

"I do, but Logan I was wondering if you and Carlos could go get us some food" I am hungry but I needed to talk to James and hopefully they got that.

"Yea come on Carlos. We'll be back later." They left and I walked out into the hallway and out a back door with James following me. When the door slams I turn around and face a somber looking James.

"I'm an asshole"

"Yes you are."

"I'm trying to apologize jackass."

"Sorry continue."

"Thankyou. Look James I've taken care of Katie ever since she was seven years old, she's like my little girl. But I know she's growing up." I hated that she's growing up, I just wanted to keep her the little girl she was when we left this place. "And I understand that she makes her own choices but I don't have to like it. What I don't understand why she likes you." I dodge a hit from James who is laughing also. "But I guess you two are good together."

"Are you ok with us being together?"

"Yea I guess am. Just don't hurt her James or I swear I'll kill you."

"And I'll let you. I love Katie Kendall; I'd never do anything to hurt her."

"I know you wouldn't and next time you want to sleep with my sister please go far away from where I'm staying"

"Will do"

We stood there for a few more minutes talking about random shit when the door opened.

"Kendall Knight?" We both turned around to see a nurse standing there.

"Yea?" I try not to get my hopes up just yet.

"Let's go your twins." She shot me a super cheery smile and I could seriously do cartwheels if I wanted right now. I started down the hallway and then stopped. Camille should be with me not laying in some bed unconscious.

"You want me to come with you?"

"Yea"

* * *

><p>We're standing in front of a large window as a nurse is holding two little bundles. One wrapped in pink and the other in blue. The nurse had warned me that they would have oxygen tubes but it still broke my heart.<p>

"She looks just like Camille" James pointed to my little girl. She does, her dark hair is already slightly curled and her nose looks just like Camille's.

"Yea she does"

"He looks like you, you know."

"You know that's not possible James." I looked back at my little boy; his blond hair in contrast to his dark hair was sticking up everywhere.

"I know but it doesn't make it any less true." I looked back again and he does look a little like me. But that could just be because of what Jack looks like. Blonde hair and blue eyes. I just hope he looks more like Camille.

"Do you want to hold them?" The nurse asked and I started to back up. I don't want to hold them without Camille. A hand grabbed my back, stopping me from walking back into the waiting room.

"It'll be ok just go see them." James pushed me towards the door and flashed me one of his famous smiles. I walked in and over to the nurse who was holding them. I sat down and let her hand me them. They are so tiny, smaller than a normal baby but still so amazing.

"Hi babies, I'm your daddy. Even though you're early I'm still excited to meet you. So is your mama but she's still a little tired. I guess you two were just a little bit more ready than me and your mama."

I sat there rocking back and forth until the nurses told me I could go see Camille. I handed the babies back to the nurse and went to go see their mother.

I walk in and she's still sleeping so I pull up a sit and grab her hand and wait for her to wake up. I hold her hand and let the tears flow. I don't know what I did to deserve this woman or those babies but I am truly the luckiest man in the world.

**Camille.**

I dread opening my eyes, I know where I am and I'm scared to death that something terrible happened. Something doesn't feel right. I feel like something's missing. My eyes flicker open and I let the blinding white lights take over me before squeezing my eyes shut and then open them, letting them adjust to the light. There's a steady beep coming from a machine in the corner and an I.V. in my arm. I look around the bland white hospital room looking for anything, anyone. I quickly spot Kendall sitting in a chair looking out the window, tears streaking down his face.

"Kendall…" His head snapped over to the direction of where I'm at. I'm surprised that he could even hear me, with how scratchy my voice. He took a deep breath of relief and walked over to my bed, wrapping his arms around me. I hug him back, ignoring the pain in my lower stomach.

"The babies?" I ask hopefully. They need to be ok; I know they'll make it. Even if they're not really Kendall's babies I know they're as strong as him. But something still feels wrong.

He hesitates a minute more and my own tears start flowing. He pulls me close enough to feel his heartbeat race.

"My babies Kendall?"

"Camille… I… they…" My heart shatters when I look up at his red rimmed eyes and tear stained face. I feel like my world is crashing and burning. I let the tears flow and cry harder than I ever had before. I sit up and bury my head in his shoulder.

Dear god this can't be happing, not now, not when everything was going so right.

He pulled back and looked at me with a smile on his face.

"Baby they're perfect."

"What?"

"Yea they're going to be ok and they're perfect Camille. You don't even know." I can't believe it, but they're still early.

"They're early though."

"Yea I know. They're on oxygen and they're small and test need to be done but their doctor said besides that they're healthy." I started bawling uncontrollably; Freddie brought me into his arms and let me cry into his shoulder. This was the scariest, yet most amazing experience in my entire life.

"I was so scared Kendall."

"I know I was too. I am so glad that you and the babies are ok"

"Me too" Along with being an actress all I wanted in life was to be a mother and it was almost taken away from me.

"Do you want to see them?" He spoke softly in my ear brushing back my hair.

"Yes, oh yes please Kendall" I sat up straighter and pushed him off the bed. I just want to see my babies.

"Ok. Ok. Calm down pretty girl." He kissed my forehead softly and left my room. Oh gosh I can't wait to just hold them and have them near me.

I sit here for a few minutes thinking about everything that had happened the last few hours when Kendall comes in followed by two nurses pushing two little beds. They roll the bassinets over to me and then hand them to me. They are beyond perfect, even with little tubes taped to their noses.

"Their perfect."

"They are." God I don't think this could get any better. They are so perfect. I can't even describe it. I nestle them closer towards me and my little boy grabbed a hold of my finger.

"He's so strong Kendall." He opened his eyes letting me see them for the first time. They're a darkish blue almost green and I swear with his blond hair he looks just like Kendall.

"He looks just like you Kendall."

"James said that too and so did most of the nurses."

"Well their right he looks just likes his daddy." Kendall smiled and took him from me allowing to hold my little girl, she has the same blue almost green eyes as her brother but she has dark brown curly hair. These babies are the most perfect babies in the world.

"I love you Kendall."

"I love you too Camille."

"Always" He laughed and sat next to me putting his arm around me with one arm well holding our baby boy with the other. I haven't said that in so long.

"I haven't heard that in so long. But forever baby." I snuggled into his touch cooing at our babies. This was defiantly unexpected but so amazing. I'm pretty sure I would do this all over again if I had to.

**PAGEBREAK**

We've spent the last four hours with the babies and each other, adjusting to parenthood. Now Kendall and I are sitting on my bed with the twins playing peek-a-boo with them. They're not really doing anything but they do smile a little. Everyone thinks it's hilarious. Mrs. Knight, Katie, Logan, James and Carlos are here and just hanging out. James and Katie walked in together, with his are wrapped around her waist. When they walked in Kendall tensed up again, but then relaxed when he saw how happy Katie is.

"What are their names?" I looked up at Kendall perplexed. With everything happening the last few weeks and then today we hadn't picked out names yet. It's actually one of the only things that Kendall and I have fought over.

"Oh we haven't chosen any yet. We're kind of having a hard time with it." Mrs. Knight laughed and made her way to us.

"Oh sweetie when I had Kendall he didn't have a name until about ten minutes before we were signed out." I laughed at that, but I defiantly do not want to wait until we leave for them to have names.

"Mom how'd you choose"

"Well for Katie it was simple I wanted her to be named after my grandmother but for you we just couldn't decide you had about four names before we finally picked Kendall. But I saw it in one of the baby books and I just knew that it was right and then his middle name came from my father." I smiled when Kendall smiled, being named after his grandfather was something that he is so proud of. He looked up to that man so much. He was the only real male influence that Kendall once his dad was arrested.

"What four names were they Jen?"

"Well his middle name and then Taylor, Liam and Ryan." I started thinking about it, Kendall is a great man as was his grandfather and I know how much Kendall would love for him to be a part of the twin's life.

"I have a name."

"What is it?"

"Henry Francis." Henry from my father and Francis from Kendall and his grandfather.

"Really yea Kendall I want him to have at least a little part of you." He smiled and kissed my forehead.

"I love it and you and little Henry and Wendalyn…"

"Wendalyn?" I asked slowly while trying to stifle my laughter. That is the weirdest name ever but I'm just gonna humor him.

"Don't laugh. I think it's awesome."

"Well exactly did you come up with this?"

"Well you wanted Kendall for her but I wanted Wynn so I came with Wendalyn and yes I am a genus."

"I like it. You're awesome babe." I lean in to kiss him and he leans in as well.

"I know…" He pulls back and sighs over-dramatically and looks at Carlos.

"Wait. why Wynn?"

"It's my mom's maiden name."

"Oh well continue."

"Thank you." He pressed his lips against mine and I smiled into the kiss. I pulled back and scooped up the babies, giving Henry to Kendall and tucking Winnie in my arms.

"So everyone meet Henry Francis and Wendalyn Fae Knight." Everyone gathered around Henry and Winnie. Laughter, cooing, smiling and crying field the room. I can't be happier then I am right now. I have Kendall who is an amazing man who I can't imagine living my life without and then Logan, Carlos, James, Mrs. Knight and Katie who are more of a family to me than my own and now Winnie and Henry. I just can't wait to get back home in L.A. and really start our new lives and where we can be together the four of us always and forever.

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><p><em><strong>an: so what did y'all think and this isn't the last chapter not yet anyways**_

_**b.**_

_**p.s. the next chapter won't be up until friday or saturday and that will be the last**_


	11. the end

**_a/n: I'm back online woohoo. I swear my router was bipolar but anywhoodles so this is the last chapter. booooo :( but all it had to end sometime. so this is like an epilogue I guess. _**

**_so I hope this chapter is good._**

**_and I am so thankful for everyone who has story alerted, favorited and reviewed. You guys are awesome thankyou so much _**

**_and I would really like to thank happygirl57 every time I saw your name in my email I did a little dance, you're the best._**

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><p><em><strong>The man you don't have to be<strong>_

_**The end**_

_**Two months later**_

It's been two months since Winnie and Henry were born and everything has gone amazing. The first few nights were a little rough but after we got a pattern set it was pretty much smooth sailing, even though Winnie did stop breathing a few times throughout the night. But she only did a couple of times and the doctors want her to stay on oxygen for a while. Henry is just amazing and getting so big, they both are, they're a little over fifteen pounds, still a little small but they're healthy. And I don't care what anyone says Henry looks just like Kendall. His eyes are a green now and his hair is just as blonde. Winnie has one brown eye and one blue eye and her hair has gotten curlier and I never ever want to cut it. They're so beautiful and precious and darling and Kendall is an amazing father.

We spent a week in the hospital and then two more weeks in Minnesota just in case the twins needed to go back to the hospital. But now we've been home for the last two days and it's been amazing, being here with just the four of us plus Katie, James, Carlos and Logan and Mrs. Knight for now. The trip home was interesting to say the least. Kendall was freaking out over Winnie and Henry. It was kind of funny actually. I swear he moved the car seats around four times before I had to tell him to just let it be. They actually slept the entire way home.

Right now the twins are sleeping and I'm getting dressed. In a little less than an hour I'm going to become Mrs. Kendall Knight. I'm so excited my heart is racing against my ribcage right now. He asked me the night the twins were born. At first I wasn't so sure about it, I thought that maybe he just felt obligated but then he told me that he wouldn't here if he didn't love me or the babies. So we talked about it and I decided that I love him and he loves me so we're doing it. Today we're getting married.

**Knock. Knock. Knock.**

"Come in" I turn around just as Katie and Mrs. Knight, who's crying, walk in the door.

"Oh my god you look so beautiful Camille." I hugged them both and welcomed them into the room.

"So are you excited?"

"Yea I am."

"Good I'm glad I've always wanted a sister." I smiled and pulled her into a tight embrace. I pulled back when a loud sob interrupted the quiet.

"Mom why are you crying?"

"I'm just so… Oh my baby's getting married and I'm gaining another daughter and I have grandbabies and oh you Katie you're growing up and moving in with James and I just I..." She let out another loud watery cry and pulled Katie and me into a hug. I pull away and kissed her cheek. Ever since the boys moved out here Mrs. Knight has been like a mother to me.

"Ok ok we need to stop all this blubbering before Camille ruins her makeup." Oh Katie. What are we going to do with that child? She stepped back and straightened out her blue dress.

This day could have not come sooner. I've waited for this since I was eighteen. And for all we've been through over the last few months this is all I want. Kendall, my babies and I'm pretty sure I'll be good.

I pick up Henry and Winnie cradling them softly in my arms.

"Oh little babies today we're finally going to become a family." Even though Kendall and I have been a family since the day he saved me it's going to be nice for all four of us to be Knights.

**Kendall**

I pulled knot on my tie up and smoothed out my shirt. Today's the day I'm getting married. I can't wait to see Camille at the end of that aisle in little while. I remember when I was younger I promised that I would never get married and take the chance of turning out like my father. I know it's most likely not possible but I still think of it. These last few months have been awesome. The twins are adorable and being with Camille is so amazing. I love being a father to Henry and Winnie and now I'm going to be a husband to Camille.

**Knock. Knock. Knock.**

"Hey man" I look up from tucking in my shirt just as James, Carlos and Logan walk in.

"Hey guys" I finished tucking my shirt into my slacks and slipped on my vest.

"How're you doing?" Logan asked as he walked over to me and helped me slip on my jacket.

"I'm good. Excited. Nervous"

"Why are you nervous?"

"What if she changes her mind?" It's something I've been worrying about ever since I asked.

"Why would she change her mind Kendall?" I sat down and ran my hand through hair which James promptly smacked it away and began fussing with my hair.

"Because there are better men out there than me, men that don't have anger issues or father issues or who aren't gone for days on end for his job or…"

"Kendall stop." Logan rested his hand on my shoulder and sat down in front of me.

"Look Kendall, I don't know why she chose you…"

"I bet it's the eyebrows" I elbowed James in the ribs as Logan and Carlos threw a pillow and a shoe at him.

"Anyways as I was saying I don't know why Camille chose you but she has her reason's. She loves you."

"Yea and Kendall you're an amazing guy, everyone has their own issues and Camille understands that you're gonna be gone a lot. She knows what kind of guy you are. And Kendall most guys wouldn't stick around and date let alone marry a woman who has another man's children and become those children's father. You love her and she loves you and that's all that should matter."

"Thanks Carlos. I guess I'm panicking for nothing."

"Exactly you are. Everything will be fine, we're all gonna go down to the back yard and see all the awesomeness that Logan, Carlos and I did and Camille is gonna walk down the aisle to you and you're gonna get married and be happy ok?"

"Thankyou for that James" I said sarcastically.

"You're welcome. Katie just texted me and said that they're almost ready." I growled at James, it's been two months but I'm still getting use to them dating and now she's moving in. So now it's gonna be Camille, me, the twins, Logan, Carlos, James and now Katie. This is going to be interesting.

"Be nice Kendall."

"Oh hush you. Ok so are you ready Kendall?" I looked over to my best friends, my bothers, they've all been there for me and now we're growing up and things are changing and honestly I can't be happier. Our family is now growing. I don't know how long we're all going to be together but hopefully it's a while.

"Yea let's go" I grabbed my grandfather's watch, slipped it on and followed the guys down to the back yard, where everything is set up. Our friends and family are here, even Gustavo, I knew that guy loved me. I get down the aisle and my nervousness came back.

"Calm down Kendall it's gonna be ok"

"I know, I'll be fine" James pat me on my back. Music started James, Carlos and Logan all turned to the front and I followed suit. My mom walks down the aisle holding Henry. She passes him off to James who was behind me, and then gave me a kiss and a tight squeeze before going to sit in the front. Katie walked down holding little Winnie in her arms. They look so beautiful. She goes and stands across from me. She looks so grown up and I may not like it but I'm happy that her and James have each other.

The music changes and everyone stands, I look down the aisle to see my beautiful Camille standing there on her father's arm smiling at me. She looks stunning in her white knee length long sleeve lace gown. She started walking down the aisle and the next thing I knew she was in front of me and her father was giving her hand to me.

God I can't get over how beautiful she is. Her eyes shine brighter than I've ever seen before and her smile has never been bigger.

"Do you Kendall take Camille to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do"

"Do you Camille…"

"I do" everyone laughed out and Camille's smile just got wider.

"Sorry go ahead"

"Do you Camille take Kendall to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do"

"I now pronounce you husband and wife"

"Finally" Camille smiles and steps forward and capturers my lips with hers.

"I love you Camille"

"I love you Kendall and thank you"

"For what"

"For being the man you didn't have to be." I leaned in and stole a kiss.

"I really do love you Camille"

"Well good I'm glad I love you too." We take the twins from Katie and James, who wouldn't stop making sex eyes at each other and walked down the aisle.

This life has given me a lot of heartache throughout the years but I would go through it all again a hundred times over just to have what I have. To just be able to call Henry and Winnie my children and Camille my wife, I am the luckiest man in the world.

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><p><em><strong>an: so what did y'all think tell me tell me in one last review**_

_**:) b.**_


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